How to be a good lover book: Paget, Lou: 9780749921040: Amazon.com: Books

How to Be a Great Lover by Lou Paget: 9780804151351

About How to Be a Great Lover

One of America’s most popular sexperts offers a fun, refreshingly modern, totally explicit guide to mastering a man’s body.

No matter what age we are or how much experience we have, we all want to be great lovers. Most of the sex guides for women, however, have been prudish, esoteric, or incomplete. The ultimate sexual instruction book for women, How to Be a Great Lover gives you the down and dirty details that you really want to know on exactly what men like and why, and shares the proven erotic techniques that make for incredible sex you’ll both enjoy.  

Acclaimed sex expert Lou Paget draws on the real-life experience of the hundreds of men and women who have attended her workshops and presents their secrets and tricks in an elegant, no-nonsense style. Lou has found that in the bedroom (or closet, or kitchen), knowledge equals confidence, and confidence will make you feel empowered, heighten the intimacy of your relationship, and enable you and your partner to enjoy yourselves in a variety of intense, new ways.

Whether you are starting a new relationship, have run out of creative ideas, or want to light his fire all over again, How to Be a Great Lover has enough spicy tips and surprises to excite both of you and leave him begging for more.

From kissing techniques, ways to create the right atmosphere, and a lesson on safe sex–including the “Italian Method” of putting a condom on a man with your mouth–to twenty different manual techniques and the secrets of great oral sex,  Lou covers all the basics and more.  She offers innovative positions for intercourse, tantalizing moves you can do with a pearl necklace, and a beginner’s guide to anal stimulation, as well as a catalogue of sex toys and how to use them.  With more than ninety step-by-step illustrations that will show you how to drive him wild,

How to Be a Great Lover provides proven, sure-fire techniques that will make you a master of the bedroom.

25 Books To Improve Your Sex Life and Relationships (2020)

Looking for an awesome list of sex books to improve your sex life and intimate relationships?

Let’s goo! Here are some of our favorite sex books! 😉

Knowledge is the key to many things in life, and books are an amazing source of that knowledge others want to share with us.

When we read a book, we download that knowledge that others have experienced into our brains.

This process is lacking in the areas of relationships and sex.

Most people believe that we are naturally able to have the best relationship and the best sex.

These people are missing the boat big time.

There is a wealth of knowledge out there in books to help you improve your sex life and yes, your relationship, too.

Unforgettable Books To Improve Your Sex Life

Even if you think your relationship and sex life is great, it isn’t going to stay there on its own.  You need to be constantly improving and adding excitement to your relationship.

Now that doesn’t mean just going out and picking up a book of different sexual positions.

There are many deeper and more meaningful ways to improve your relationship.

Below is a listing of books that I recommend to individuals or couples wanted to keep improving their relationships. You can also check out these books on relationships for happy couples.

This book gives you 50 great was to add a little more play, fun and metaphysical approaches to your lovemaking. Sexy Challenges are not just a book for reading but one for actions. 

After reading a challenge you then follow the plan to create that sacred and sensual experience for both you and your partner.

The beauty of each challenge is that it allows you to change it up a bit each and every time. Giving you different suggestions so you can totally transform the experience the next time you participate in it. So while this book holds 50 challenges, those 50 can be turned into unlimited experiences.

Serge Kahili King uses his Hawaiian shaman roots and the ancient love based tradition of Huna to help us mold our life into the piece of art. This book can be used on everything: from your health, to your happiness, and yes – to improve your sex life.

This book will help you on the path of improving everything in your life starting with the most important person: YOU!

In this book you get a grand overview of how important sex is to our world. It takes the act of sex out of just the physical plane, and offers you a more spiritual and natural view of how important it is in our relationships. Osho has a whimsical style of storytelling that will have you chuckling as you read his teachings.

4 . Love and Awakening by John Wellwood

You need to understand that your relationship has a business side to it. 23 couples are interviewed in this book and they share their secrets not only to a successful business, but a successful relationship, too.

From small town shop owners to self-help gurus, this book is full of great suggestions to keep you thriving in business – and in love.

This book started a revolution in playfulness in the sex lives of couples, and still is one of the biggest gifts young couples receive for weddings and anniversaries.

Laura Corn has crafted elegant and pleasure-filled plays for couples to act out, making them stars in their relationship. Using the thrill of anticipation, 101 Nights of Great Sex will have you putting amazing attention into your intimate play.

 

The Guide To Getting it On is an encyclopedia of all things sexual. With constant revisions, this book keeps getting thicker and thicker. It covers it all: from sex with disabilities to the history of sex and popular culture. With a humor approach, this is a great educational tool for anyone. We have actually given this book to our sons so that they can learn about all types of sexuality and sexual fun.

Awesome Books To Improve Your Sex Life

This book opened my eyes to the spiritual and metaphysical world of sex, creating a life-long learning process for myself. In this book, you will find out how ordinary people can open a portal to different spiritual realms via their lovemaking.

After reading this book, I realized that amazing things happen if you are more present in your lovemaking.

Communication is a huge topic in relationships.

In this book, you learn how just by changing a few words in your vocabulary can set your relationship on fire. When we speak the same words over and over to our partner, they tend to lose their importance. This book gives you the tools to change those words so that your partner starts listening again.

Saying “I love you” is powerful – but what if you tell you partner you adore them or that you honor them? This is the same message with a different feel each time.

With this couples journal, you’ll be able to create unique bucket list goals you want to achieve together, journal your bucket list adventure memories together and have a place to put your favorite photo that captures your bucket list goal experience.

Besides, the book also includes engaging questions that you can use as conversation starters, bucket list ideas for couples as well as bucket list journaling pages to write your bucket list experiences.

Little Moments of Love is an adorable collection of comics detailing the simple, precious, silly, everyday moments that make up a relationship.

Whether you read them alone or with your significant other, it’s a nice collection to have at hand any time you’re feeling down or need a reminder to be as loving as you can be.

In this book, Dr. Gary Chapman shares his proven approach to showing and receiving love that will help you experience deeper and richer levels of intimacy with your significant other.

The book aims to help you discover how to keep your relationship fresh and growing amid the complexities of life.

Based on groundbreaking research and brain science, Come as You Are, explains why and how women’s sexuality works. The book seeks to help the reader understand and learn how to influence the factor’s that affect a woman’s sexual well-being.

In Mating in Captivity, Esther Perel provides a bold, provocative new take on intimacy and sex. The author explains how our cultural penchant for equality, togetherness, and absolute candor is antithetical to erotic desire for both men and women.

In this book, Ian Kerner offers techniques and philosophy for a healthier, more fulfilling sex life for her and him. The author seeks to help men understand how to lead a woman through the entire process of arousal time and time again.

 

More Books To Improve Your Sex Life

Sex at Dawn is a provocative, entertaining book that challenges conventional wisdom about sex, monogamy, marriage, and family. The book re-evaluates human sexual behavior.

This classic guide to male spirituality provides a practical guide for living a masculine life of integrity, authenticity, and freedom. It seeks to help men cultivate trust and put forth the best versions of themselves in a dynamic world.

The Guide To Getting It On, is a down to earth and fun to read book for people who want to have really good sex. It contains information about sex written by people who have done the homework.

In Sheet Music, Dr. Kevin Leman offers an actionable guide to sex for married and engaged couples. The book has a warm and friendly tone to make it easier for married couples to discuss sex and intimacy.

Position of the Day contains 366 hand-picked erotic scenarios – one for each day of the year.  Illustrated with anatomically correct drawn figures, the positions run the lusty gamut from plausible to creative to Honey.

In What Do Women Want?, renowned journalist Daniel Bergner disseminates the latest scientific research and paints an unprecedented portrait of female lust: the triggers, the fantasies, the mind-body connection, and the reasons behind the loss of libido.

This book seeks to dispel commonly accepted myths and misunderstandings surrounding human sexuality. The authors aim to help readers understand how to have a safe, pleasurable and healthy sex life.

This book provides an extensive overview of human sexual behavior from a biopsychosocial perspective. Written from a sex-positive perspective, the book covers topics such as gender and sexual orientation, relationships, sexual behaviors, sexual difficulties and solutions, and much more.

Rethinking Sexuality challenges and equips Christians to think and act biblically and compassionately in matters of sexuality. It equips you to share the love and grace of Jesus as you encounter the pain of sexual brokenness–your own or someone else’s.

What other books to improve your sex life would you add to the list?

Okay, I have given you a list of 10 books I suggest to help improve your sex life, but there are many, many, more books out there to not only read but also to experience.

Get to your library, local bookstore, or online and find something that will help your relationship keep learning and thriving.

A new book on a shelf is a beautiful thing but a book that is highlighted and has notes in the margins is one that is put into action. Those are the books I love!

Read on lovers the quest for knowledge is sexy.

Want to read more books to improve your sex life? Check some more Amazon bestsellers.

17 Books That’ll Make You Better In Bed

We’d all love to be our best, most confident selves — in bed and out. But the truth is that everyone has their baggage and hangups. Some of us are insecure because of prior scenarios in relationships, or simply due to being in untried waters. If you feel this way, you’re 100 percent not alone. Wipe the sweat from your brow.

What that all boils down to? It means that not all of us are as good in bed as we’d like to be.

The nice thing, however, is that many of the aspects of the mating game are a skill, and can be taught, nurtured, or improved. So like with any life skill we desire improving, the answer may be to study. That’s right — you can turn to books! Read up on some of these titles below to get tips, tricks, and peeks into the psychology behind what drives your sex drive, and you may find the way you approach what happens between the sheets can shift in ways you never imagined. These books by Esther Perel, Christopher Ryan, Jaclyn Friedman, and others will give you a whole bunch of new ideas to mull over:

Sex at Dawn: How We Mate, Why We Stray, and What It Means for Modern Relationships by Christopher Ryan

A lot of how we relate to each other — in bed and out — is all about human nature. This book delves deep into the science behind our interactions, using spins on conventional wisdom to show us how to be better at loving — and better lovers while we’re at it.

“We are at war with our eroticism,” the authors write in the introduction. “We battle our hungers, expectations, and disappointments. Religion, politics, and even science square off against biology and millions of years of evolved appetites. How to defuse this intractable struggle?”

Mating in Captivity: Unlocking Erotic Intelligence by Esther Perel

You’ve likely heard her podcast, seen her TED talks, or read articles about her, but have you read Esther Perel’s books? In Mating In Captivity, the acclaimed therapist, writer, and thinker examines the challenges of maintaining desire in long-term relationships.

“I’m less inclined toward a statistical approach to sex — whether you’re still having it, how often, how long it lasts, who comes first, and how many orgasms you have,” Esther Perel proclaims in the introduction. “Instead, I want to address the questions that don’t have easy answers. This book speaks about eroticism and the poetics of sex, the nature of erotic desire and its attendance dilemmas. When you love someone, how does it feel? And when you desire someone, how is it different? Does good intimacy always lead to good sex? Why is that the transition to parenthood so often spells erotic disaster? Why is the forbidden so erotic? Is it possible to want what we already have?”

Becoming Cliterate: Why Orgasm Equality Matters — and How To Get It by Dr. Laurie Mintz

Much of mainstream media would have you believe that sex isn’t sex unless someone’s vagina is being penetrated by someone’s penis. The problem is that most people with vaginas don’t reach orgasm reliably with just penetration. That’s where the clitoris comes in. In this guide to cliteracy (sorry), Dr. Laurie Mintz examines the history of the pleasure gap, explains the anatomy of the vagina, and offers techniques for great, clitoris-focused sex.

“So what’s the problem here?” Dr. Mintz asks in the first chapter of her book. “We’re doing too much of what we consider f*cking (aka intercourse) and not enough of other sexual activities.”

What You Really Really Want: The Smart Girl’s Shame-Free Guide to Sex and Safety by Jaclyn Friedman

Jaclyn Friedman – who co-edited the acclaimed anthology Yes Means Yes! with Jessica Valenti — presents a guide to defining your sexuality, even while inundated with messages from the world about how you should be, who you should love, and how you should love. This book might help you gain the confidence you need to be 100% true to yourself, in bed and outside of it.

“…this book focuses on the one sexual relationship you’re going to have for your whole life: the one you have with yourself,” Jaclyn Friedman writes in the introduction. “Because once you develop a healthy, happy, reality-based relationship with your own sexuality, you’ll have everything you need to figure out the rest.

Come as You Are: The Surprising New Science that Will Transform Your Sex Life by Emily Nagoski Ph.D.

In this research-backed exploration of the sexuality of people with vaginas, Dr. Emily Nagoski stresses three points that can improve your sex life: Everyone’s sexual response mechanisms are different, sex happens in a context, and you should focus on how you’re feeling not on what you’re doing. They’re simple lessons, backed up by science, and they could change everything about your sex life.

“The problem here,” Dr. Nagoski writes in the introduction to Come As You Are, “is that we’ve been taught to think about sex in terms of behavior, rather than in terms of biological, psychological, and social processes underlying the behavior. We think about our psychological behavior — blood flow and genital secretions and heart rate. We think about our social behavior — what we do in bed, whom we do it with, and how often. […] But if you really want to understand human sexuality, behavior alone won’t get you there. Trying to understand sex by looking at behavior is like trying to understand love by looking at a couple’s wedding portrait… and their divorce papers. […] What we want to know is why and how it came to be.”

The Ethical Slut, Third Edition: A Practical Guide to Polyamory, Open Relationships, and Other Freedoms in Sex and Love by Janet W. Hardy and Dossie Easton

For some people, maintaining desire means pursuing polyamorous or open relationships. Updated in 2017, The Ethical Slut is a guide to all things poly and everything it encompasses: emotional honesty, mutually agreed upon boundaries, open communication, and more. Even if you don’t want to open things up, the lessons of this book can be a good foundation for growth in your partnership.

“One of the most valuable things we learn from open sexual lifestyles is that our programming about love, intimacy, and sex can be rewritten,” the authors write in the introduction. “When we begin to question all the ways we have been told we ought to be, we can begin to edit and rewrite our old tapes. By breaking the rules, we both free and empower ourselves.”

Pleasure Activism: The Politics of Feeling Good by adrienne maree brown

This isn’t a book solely about how the erotic can change your sex life. This is a book about how the erotic can change everything about your life and the world around you. In these essays, author and editor adrienne maree brown posits that doing good can feel good, and that feeling good is a complex political topic, too.

“We are in a time of fertile ground for learning how we align our pleasures with our values, decolonizing our bodies and longings, and getting into a practice of saying an orgasmic yes together, deriving our collective power from our felt sense of pleasure,” brown writes in the introduction. “I think a result of sourcing power in our longing and pleasure is abundant justice — that we can stop competing with each other, demanding scare justice from our oppressors. That we can instead generate power from the overlapping space of desire and aliveness, tapping into an abundance that has enough attention, liberation, and justice for all of us to have plenty.

The Feminist Porn Book: The Politics of Producing Pleasure edited by Tristan Taormino, Constance Penley, Celine Parrenas Shimizu, and Mireille Miller-Young

In this collection, feminists in the adult industry and feminist porn scholars writes about porn — how people do it, film it, market it, consume it, and more. It may just help you rethink how sex functions in society, and help you figure out how sex functions in your life.

“Throughout the book, we explore the multiple definitions of feminist porn, but we refuse to fix its boundaries,” the authors write in the introduction. “Feminist porn is a genre and a political vision. And like other genres of film and media, feminist porn shares common themes, aesthetics, and goals even though its parameters are not clearly demarcated. Because it is born out of a feminism that is not one thing but a living, breathing, moving creation, it is necessarily contested — an argument, a polemic, and a debate.”

Later, they add: “[W]e believe in the radical potential of feminist porn to transform sexual representation and the way we live our sexualities.

Untrue: Why Nearly Everything We Believe About Women, Lust, and Infidelity Is Wrong and How the New Science Can Set Us Free by Wednesday Martin

In this exploration of female infidelity, author and researcher Wednesday Martin challenges societal notions about women who cheat. Drawing on the political and social history, Martin makes a powerful case about gender and sexual equality that might help you understand your own feelings about it all.

Untrue is a book with a point of view — namely that whatever else we may think of them, women who reject monogamy are brave, and their experiences and possible motivations are instructive,” Martin writes in the introduction. “Not only because female infidelity is far from uncommon but also because the fact of it and our reactions to it are useful metrics of female autonomy, and of the price women continue to pay for seizing privileges that have historically belonged to men.”

Faking It: The Lies Women Tell about Sex — And the Truths They Reveal by Lux Alptraum

In Faking It, sex educator and former CEO of Fleshbot Lux Alptraum unpacks all the lies women tell about sex — how many partners they’ve had, whether or not they orgasmed, whether or not they’ve been sexually assaulted, etc. — and explores how they impact women’s social status, safety, and pleasure. If you’ve ever lied about sex in any way, pick up this book and think about why.

“Is the female urge to fake purely about preserving male ego at the expense of a woman’s access to enjoyment — or are there other, more complicated reasons why a woman might feign an orgasm when she isn’t actually feeling it?” Alptraum asks in the first chapter of Faking It. “Is the acting of faking an orgasm truly a betrayal of the fight for women’s liberation, or is it, perhaps, a way of claiming control over a sexual situation? Why is the authenticity of anyone’s orgasm worth discussion to begin with?”

Black Sexual Politics: African Americans, Gender, and the New Racism by Patricia Hill Collins

In this work of critical theory, Patricia Hill Collins examines how images of Black women and Black men often focus on hypersexuality, and calls for a reinvention of sexuality that’s free from the constraints of racism. This isn’t a guide to getting better; this is a guide to understanding how racism, classism, and structural inequality contribute to the ways sex is portrayed and, often, weaponized.

The Kama Sutra has reached cult status, but how many of us have actually taken the time to read its hallowed pages? This is an ancient text, originally in Sanskrit, that shares the art of lovemaking and its connection not only to pleasure, but spiritual enlightenment.

Vibrator Nation: How Feminist Sex-Toy Stores Changed the Business of Pleasure by Lynn Comella

In Vibrator Nation, Lynn Comella examines the social, historical, political, and cultural impact of sex-toy stores and the people who opened them. The entrepreneurs behind places like Eve’s Garden and Babeland have doubled as social activists, and in this enlightening nonfiction book, Comella describes just how much that’s changed people’s sex lives.

“[F]eminist sex-toy stores produce a particular understanding of what it means to be a happy, healthy, and sexually empowered individual, and offer a consumer-oriented agenda for how this might be achieved, Comella writes in her introduction. “At the center of this retail universe is the discourse — and, one might argue, sexual ethic — or sex positivity. Sex positivity is a way of conceptualizing and talking about sexuality that seeks to intervene in a culture overwhelmingly shaped by the belief that sex is a dangerous, destructive, and negative force.”

The Erotic Mind: Unlocking the Inner Sources of sexual Passion and Fulfillment by Jack Morin

This text analyzes many stories of sexual encounters, by means of demonstrations of how we can make our own relationships and encounters that much more explosive. Sometimes overcoming our hindrances and problems is simply a matter of examining our situation from a new, fresh perspective.

“Almost everyone is aware that becoming around feels good,” Dr. Jack Morin writes in the introduction. “But how can we create greater arousal when we know so little about it? Why are certain people, images, and situations so much more stimulating than others? Why do individual preferences and patterns vary so dramatically? Why are most of us attached to specific turn-ons? And what do our turn-ons reveal about who we are and what we’re searching for?”

The first-ever sex guide written for women by women for the sexual passion between women (phew!), this is an amazing work for if you want to kick your sex life up a few notches and are looking for creative ideas!

“[W]hat makes me a lesbian sex expert,” writes Felice Newman in the introduction to the second edition, “is that I have devoted myself to erotic exploration. I treat my sex life as an adventure story that builds heat with each episode. I’m curious. Whom will I meet today? What will happen next? I seek abundance. Ample pleasure. Innumerable orgasms. Voluptuous moments bursting with erotic energy. I believe we all deserve as much erotic pleasure as life can offer — which is more pleasure really than you or I can conceive of.”

Partners in Passion by Mark A. Michaels and Patricia Johnson

The co-authors of this work, a couple, are two teachers of tantric love and sex. They use their experience to illustrate the beauty of “giving and receiving” — in love, life, and in sex. They also discuss situations like open relationships and swinging, and how to know if this is the choice for your own relationship.

“The tools it takes to have a vibrant, fulfilling, and expansive sex life are the same ones that can be used to create a satisfying long-term relationship,” the authors write in their preface. “There are countless how-to sex manuals on the market. This is not one of those books. Merely finding the right moves or honing in on that perfect spot will not create a great sexual relationship. We seek to provide you with a foundation for an enduring and mutually satisfying erotic partnership.”

Unlike the other books on this list, Sexographies doesn’t profess to be a guide to rethinking sex, sexuality, or the erotic. Rather, it’s a collection of first-person essays by an Argentine journalist, Gabriela Wiener, who wanted to understand the messiness of the erotic. In pursuit of truth, she participated in sexual exchanges, went to swingers clubs with her husband, underwent an egg donation, and immersed herself in the kinks, obsessions, and sexual choices of other people.

In the first essay, about notorious polygamist Ricardo Badani, she writes, “For Badani, a polygynous family consisting of one man and several women is stronger and more stable than a monogamous one. He recently celebrated his eleventh anniversary with his sixth wife, and is about to celebrate his twenty-third with the first. Badani is living proof that his experiment works.”

Additional reporting by Cristina Arreola.

This article was originally published on

8 Tips for Dating a Book Lover

Has a book lover caught your eye? We’ve got some tips for writing the two of you a happy ending.

It is love, poets say, that makes the world go around. It was true in Shakespeare’s era and it’s still true today. Ask Google or Bing to serve up a platter of “man seeking woman,” “woman seeking man,” or whatever combination may suit you and you’ll find yourself inundated with personal ads, relationship advice, and websites for

online dating.

Love is big business – and no wonder. Everyone seeks love and romance – even book lovers. Perhaps especially book lovers. Beating within the breast of every strict librarian is the wild heart of a libertine aching to be set free.

But if Sarah Ockler’s #Scandal has taught us anything, it’s that dating is a dangerous game. There are so many ways it can go wrong…but also so many ways it can go right.

#Scandal is available now a full read (through March 27th) so definitely check it out for a laugh and some pretty serious dating don’ts. On the other hand, if you or someone you know is looking for some good dating advice, keep on reading!

1.

DO ASK WHAT THEY’RE READING

On any given day, every book lover is reading at least one book. “What are you reading lately?” may seem like an innocuous conversation starter, but it’s a much more intimate question than “How do you like this weather?” or “What do you do for a living?” Committed readers have complex, intimate relations with books. When you enquire after a book lover’s current reading you are inviting them to share a bit of their soul.

Telling you the title—or worse, silently showing you the cover—is, technically, an answer to the question. But it’s not a reply to the question you were really asking. Let them know that you’re really interested with a follow-up question: “How are you liking it?” “How does it stack up to her other work?” “I couldn’t get past page 50 – did I miss the good part?”

2.

DON’T SAY YOU SAW THE MOVIE

For book lovers, the book is always better than the movie. When you say, “I never read the book, but hey, I saw the movie, so that’s almost the same thing,” all a reader can hear is fingernails on a blackboard. You might as well confess that you torture puppies for fun.

Later, after you get to know each other, you can carefully start a discussion about the very rare movies that actually are better than the books they’re based on. “The Wizard of Oz” is a possibility. “The Godfather.” Once your book-loving partner accepts you as a bona fide reader, you can have such a conversation.

3.

DO ASK ABOUT THEIR FAVORITES

Every reader has favorite books, stories, poems, and authors. Asking a book lover to discuss their favorites isn’t putting them on the spot; it’s giving them a chance to share their enthusiasm. Don’t press if your date is shy about disclosing their favorites. Everyone has guilty pleasures. Tell them about your own favorites, including books that don’t qualify as big-L literature. Your goal isn’t really to learn about the books, but to learn about them.

Once they see you are really interested, don’t be surprised if the word-flood starts.

4.

DON’T PRETEND

It’s tempting to appear more widely read than you are, or to pretend that you are familiar with authors you haven’t read. Don’t do it—a real book lover will see through you in a minute. You may know that Salman Rushdie’s

Midnight’s Children has won a series of important awards. But if you haven’t read it—and if you can’t compare it to other works of postcolonial magical realism, including the works of Gabriel García Márquez—then your claim to know the book may ring hollow. (Yeah, your book-loving babe may be a bit of a snob and that’s ok.)

There’s something touching about a swain who attempts to impress their date by quoting Shakespeare, but it’s impressive only if the quote is apt. You won’t impress your date when you tell them you dream of being like Romeo and Juliet—they both die at the end of the play.

5.

DO ASK FOR RECOMMENDATIONS

Every book lover is thrilled to share special favorites with receptive readers. If you accept a recommendation, then you must read the book or confess that you tried and found that it wasn’t to your taste. Do not under any circumstances try to get away with reading the Cliff’s Notes. You will be caught and your duplicity will be judged as serious a betrayal as sexual infidelity. Book lovers take reading very seriously.

6.

DON’T MAKE IT ALL ABOUT BOOKS

Remember, readers are people too. You can talk about current events or family or any other subject. Your book-loving date may enjoy in-line skating or bicycling.

Maybe they’ve backpacked through Asia or worked the night shift at a diner. They’ve got stories to tell that don’t come from books.

It may take a bit of coaxing, but with patience you should be able to get the book lover in your life to go bowling with you, or whip up a dessert for a pot-luck with friends, or have a traditional dinner-and-a-movie date. Book lovers sometimes need a little encouragement to live life spontaneously instead of vicariously. Your ability to live in the moment will become part of what they like about you. Share it!

7.

DO EMBRACE THE PORTABLE LIBRARY

You can’t make water run uphill, you can’t kiss your own elbow, and you can’t prevent your book-loving date from bringing a novel with them wherever the two of you go. You’ll find books in your car. You’ll eventually clear a shelf so they can keep books at your place.

They love the way a book can transform waiting at the dentist’s office from a pointless chore to a visit to Macondo or lunch at Hogwarts or a visit with Mr. Darcy. Every spare minute is an opportunity to dive into a world of the imagination.

8.

REMEMBER TO BE THANKFUL

People who read are imaginative, passionate, emotional, smart, articulate, and funny. When you find yourself dating a reader, be grateful. You’ve found a partner who can draw upon all of human history for inspiration and instruction in being a good partner. They may just make a reader of you too.

What Makes a Good Lover?

Are you an empath? To learn coping skills, get my PDF “Life Strategies for Sensitive People” here.

Purchase Download >

 

In my book, The Power of Surrender, I discuss how to manifest your full sexual power, even if you are out of touch with it now. First, you must learn to completely inhabit your body and the moment. If not now, when? Holding back, fixating on performance, or letting your mind chatter and drift is the end of passion. It’s vital to get out of your head and into your bliss.

What is true sexual power? I define it as proudly claiming your erotic self and mindfully channeling sexual energy. You never use it to hurt, manipulate, smother, make conquests or get addicted to the ego-trip of sensual pleasure at the expense of others. This is bad karma. Nor do you allow others to harm or disrespect you. Sexual power is not just who you are in bed, though that’s an aspect of it. You also make electric linkages to your body, to spirit, to a lover, to the universe. It’s a turn on when sexual power is blended with spiritual power. Too many of us in our heady, frantic world lack the rich experience of having a primal connection with someone. Sexuality can offer us this, a satisfaction you can never get from your intellect alone. As you open to both sex and spirit, whether you’re single or part of a couple, you’ll be a vessel for erotic flow, enjoying pleasure without insecurities or inhibitions.

A key aspect of sexual power is emotional intimacy, an instinctive desire to bond to a lover, to feel comfort, to be known. This makes the difference between pure physical sex and lovemaking. Emotional intimacy comes from affection, from sharing feelings, from being vulnerable. By caring you reinforce each other’s attractiveness and make each other feel special. As friends and lovers, you are fundamentally there for each other which creates trust. You see each other as real people, the good and the bad, not some idealized version. When conflict, anger, or hurt feelings arise, you’re committed to working through them.

What makes a good lover? There’s an electric chemistry between couples that is unique to them. Smell, voice, touch, and kissing style all figure in. Technical skills and good hygiene are also important. But beyond these, here are some characteristics to look for.

10 Qualities of a Good Lover from The Power of Surrender

  • You’re a willing learner
  • You’re playful and passionate
  • You make your partner feel sexy
  • You’re confident, not afraid to be vulnerable
  • You’re adventurous and willing to experiment
  • You communicate your needs and listen to your partner
  • You make time and don’t rush
  • You enjoy giving pleasure as much as you enjoy receiving it
  • You’re supportive, not judgmental
  • You’re fully present in the moment with good eye contact and can let go
  • What stops us from being good lovers? Frequently it’s time constraints, self-centeredness, inhibitions, and lack of technique. Also, our minds won’t shut off which keeps us from being in the moment. Further, many of us resist surrendering to how sexy we really are. Why? We haven’t learned to see ourselves as sexy. We’ve been brainwashed by the “skinny ideal.” Also, sex is frequently viewed more as a performance feat than a holy exchange. Growing up, most of us haven’t been given the right kind of education about what true sexiness is. If only we’d been taught that sexuality is a healthy, natural part of us that we must embody in a mindful, loving way–not something “dirty” or something to be ashamed of. Early on we learn that the words vagina and penis embarrass people. Except between lovers, they are rarely ever part of our vocabulary. We are a culture that embraces shame, only there is nothing to be ashamed of!

    Sexual responsiveness is a sensitive barometer. Intimacy requires self-awareness and a willingness to remove obstacles. Taking action can help you achieve a loving, erotic relationship. On a daily basis, train yourself to be more mindful about getting rest and pacing yourself. It’s not sexy to rush around and be constantly stressed out. Especially when you’re busy, it’s important to remember to breathe, a quick way to reconnect with your body! Though family, work, and other demands can intrude on making time sexuality, being dedicated to self-care can help you prioritize it in your relationship.

    To cure self-doubts, you need to be solution-oriented. For instance, if you wonder, “Is my technique right?” honestly talk with your partner how you can meet each other’s needs. If you’re bored with the same positions, playfully brainstorm together about exciting ways to experiment. Also, with respect, keep discussing the anger or hurt you may feel towards each other so that your resentments don’t numb passion. For more complex issues such as fear of intimacy reach out to a therapist or a friend for insight. While exploring your fears, be kind to yourself. Such sweetness allows you to mend wounds and reclaim your sexual power.

    (Excerpt from Dr. Judith Orloff’s national bestseller The Power of Surrender: Let Go and Energize Your Relationships, Success, and Well-Being)

     

    Want a Great Partner? Choose a Book Lover

    Want a Great Partner? Choose a Book Lover Share

    According to a 2006 study in Europe people who read fiction regularly show better social skills and empathy compared to those who don’t read much or those who read non-fiction. Something to do with reading fiction is like dating thousands of different characters. And this is corroborated by two separate studies by Raymond Mar and Keith Oakley, two Canadian professors who drew the conclusion that fiction readers are able to better stay in the moment, are more compassionate and make better lovers. If you want a good lover, forget the local bars and clubs. It’s time to hang out at the book store and library. Let’s explore more as to why.

    Table of contents:

    1. They Have Self-awareness
    2. They Show Greater Sensitivity to Their Lover’s Needs
    3. They Can Understand Their Own and Their Lover’s Emotions
    4. They Are Willing to Learn New Things Because They Are Open-minded
    5. They Don’t Rush and Make Time for Their Lover
    6. They Value the Finer, Intellectual Things in Life
    7. They Listen and Can Communicate Well

    1 They Have Self-awareness

    If there is a specific reason why book lovers make better lovers it is because they have greater self-awareness. Book lovers know what they like and what they don’t like. They are far better able to express their sexual and their emotional needs as a consequence. Speaking the language of love means knowing what ideas and perceptions of the world unite us rather than divide us. “Two hearts beating as one” or “two sides of the same coin” may have become clichés, but that doesn’t mean they are not true. This means you can invest in a long-term relationship, because it will only grow stronger with time.

    14 Add a comment …

    2 They Show Greater Sensitivity to Their Lover’s Needs

    Look out for your very own “Lady Chatterley’s Lover”, for he will be far more attuned to your needs than ordinary gardener or gamekeeper-Joe. We want to be loved for sure, but we also want to be understood. Book lovers will make enquiries into their lover’s needs and are willing to put their lover’s pleasure above their own. They know in-depth what it means to be male or female and have no issue with seeing things from a different perspective.

    65 Add a comment …

    3 They Can Understand Their Own and Their Lover’s Emotions

    Having spent a great deal of their time reading books where authors discuss the human condition in all its glory, misery and peril, book lovers can understand emotions better – their own and those of their loved ones. For them, making love is not just about the right approach, candlelit rooms and sexual technique or prowess. To a book lover it comes as no surprise that human emotions are complex, often baffling to those who feel them and those who have to deal with them. They have learned to identify with different characters, just like an actor has, simply by critical reading of books. An essential aspect of sexually fulfilling relationships is to enjoy emotional intimacy and have both partners show compassion in equal measure.

    19 Add a comment …

    4 They Are Willing to Learn New Things Because They Are Open-minded

    Generally speaking, book lovers are open to different world views, other cultures and customs. They are not worried about trying out new things, exploring new ways of pleasing their lovers in a sensuous or more acrobatic way. They are quite happy to explore unchartered sexual and emotional territory and don’t need a relationship map to guide them.

    1 Add a comment …

    5 They Don’t Rush and Make Time for Their Lover

    Reading means living in the moment, and book lovers can translate this approach into real life. Letting go off one’s thoughts and suspending belief to enjoy a story means they can see themselves in somebody else’s shoes and to become a character in the story they’re reading. They will pay attention to all the senses: touch, voice, looks, taste and scent. They can envisage what their lover might like, because they have learned to “read between the lines”.

    81 Add a comment …

    6 They Value the Finer, Intellectual Things in Life

    There is more to acquiring money, status and assets in life. Book lovers are open to new sensations, new perspectives, and love art, culture, books and movies included, for its own sake, not for the monetary value these things can represent. They have what our grandparents used to call “backbone”: principles, substance and depth. They have experienced joy, but also suffering and loss and found comfort in books, so have greater empathy with others.

    92 Add a comment …

    7 They Listen and Can Communicate Well

    Those who love books have acquired great language skills over the years. They love to write you letters or emails that will sweep you off your feet; they can write and recite poetry that will set your heart aflutter. They are capable of deep thinking and profound theory development and as a result, they are not just better communicators, but better listeners who will sit up and take note of their lover’s wishes and desires.

    To quote elitedaily.com who covered this same subject, “if you date someone who reads, then you, too, will live a thousand different lives” which I think is exciting. What do you think?

    Resources
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    36 of the Best Book Lover Quotes for Readers

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    I have no idea what I’d do with myself if there were no books to read – they’re an essential part of work and play for me, and without them, I’d probably be a very different person.

    Still, when people ask why I love books or reading, or why I brighten up every time I spy a bookstore or library, I can’t always find the right words to express myself. Thankfully, several people have already done it for me.

    This is a list of 36 book lover quotes that sum up all the mushy gushy feelings within me about books and reading – and hopefully they resonate with you too!

    The Best Book Lover Quotes

    “A good bookshop is just a genteel Black Hole that knows how to read.”
    ―Terry Pratchett, Guards! Guards!

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    “Books were safer than other people anyway.”
    ―Neil Gaiman, The Ocean at the End of the Lane

    “Reality doesn’t always give us the life that we desire, but we can always find what we desire between the pages of books.”
    ―Adelise M. Cullens

    “Maybe this is why we read, and why in moments of darkness we return to books: to find words for what we already know.”
    ―Alberto Manguel, A Reading Diary

    “The more that you read, the more things you will know. The more that you learn, the more places you’ll go.”
    ―Dr. Seuss, I Can Read With My Eyes Shut!

    “You can get lost in any library, no matter the size. But the more lost you are, the more things you’ll find.”
    ―Millie Florence, Lydia Green Of Mulberry Glen

    “Reading is an act of civilization; it’s one of the greatest acts of civilization because it takes the free raw material of the mind and builds castles of possibilities.
    ―Ben Okri

    “I love the sound of the pages flicking against my fingers. Print against fingerprints. Books make people quiet, yet they are so loud.”
    ―Nnedi Okorafor

    “That’s the thing about books. They let you travel without moving your feet.”
    ―Jhumpa Lahiri, The Namesake

    “Books are mirrors: you only see in them what you already have inside you.”
    ―Carlos Ruiz Zafón, The Shadow of the Wind

    “The whole world opened to me when I learned to read.”
    ―Mary McLeod Bethune

    “A reader lives a thousand lives before he dies, said Jojen. The man who never reads lives only one.”
    ―George R.R. Martin, A Dance with Dragons

    “Libraries will get you through times of no money better than money will get you through times of no libraries.”
    ―Anne Herbert

    “I have always imagined that Paradise will be a kind of library.”
    ―Jorge Luis Borges

    “I believe there is power in words, power in asserting our existence, our experience, our lives, through words.
    ―Jesmyn Ward, The Fire this Time

    “Until I feared I would lose it, I never loved to read. One does not love breathing.”
    ―Harper Lee, To Kill a Mockingbird

    “I read a book one day and my whole life was changed.”
    ―Orhan Pamuk, The New Life

    “No. I can survive well enough on my own — if given the proper reading material.”
    ―Sarah J. Maas, Throne of Glass

    “Once I began to read, I began to exist. I am what I read.”
    ―Walter Dean Myers, Open a World of Possible

    “Books don’t offer real escape, but they can stop a mind scratching itself raw.”
    ―David Mitchell, Cloud Atlas

    “I love the solitude of reading. I love the deep dive into someone else’s story, the delicious ache of a last page.”
    ―Naomi Shihab Nye

    “Reading is an active, imaginative act; it takes work.”
    ―Khaled Hosseini

    “It is well known that reading quickens the growth of a heart like nothing else.”
    ―Catherynne M. Valente, The Girl Who Circumnavigated Fairyland in a Ship of Her Own Making

    “The problem with books is that they end.”
    ―Caroline Kepnes, You

    “When I look back, I am so impressed again with the life-giving power of literature.”
    ―Maya Angelou

    “In principle and reality, libraries are life-enhancing palaces of wonder.”
    ―Gail Honeyman, Eleanor Oliphant Is Completely Fine

    “I am an omnivorous reader with a strangely retentive memory for trifles.”
    ―Arthur Conan Doyle, The Complete Sherlock Holmes

    “When I have a house of my own, I shall be miserable if I have not an excellent library.”
    ―Jane Austen, Pride and Prejudice

    “The ability to read awoke inside of me some long dormant craving to be mentally alive.”
    ―Malcolm X, The Autobiography of Malcolm X

    “You see, unlike in the movies, there is no THE END sign flashing at the end of books. When I’ve read a book, I don’t feel like I’ve finished anything. So I start a new one.”
    ―Elif Shafak, The Bastard of Istanbul

    “Read. Read. Read. Just don’t read one type of book. Read different books by various authors so that you develop different style.”
    ―R.L. Stine

    “In the end, we’ll all become stories.”
    ―Margaret Atwood, Moral Disorder and Other Stories

    “If you only read the books that everyone else is reading, you can only think what everyone else is thinking.”
    ―Haruki Murakami, Norwegian Wood


    Want more book lover quotes? Find the best quotes about books here, or our favorite quotes about reading!

    How to become a good lover: 5 tips from women

    1. Forget about what you saw in porn

    The first rule of a good lover: Forget everything that porn films teach. No, porn itself is even useful if it is a joint warm-up with a partner before the main game. It’s just that porn teaches the wrong things. The way it happens in porn videos does not happen in life. An analogy can be drawn to movies about sports: you wouldn’t learn karate from Bruce Lee’s films, would you?

    Porn films are work for the camera, not the desire to please a partner, not making love.

    Take the Backward Rider pose. This is ideal for the operator: the process is at a glance, you do not need to perform miracles of acrobatics to capture a spicy look. In reality, not the best choice. First, the penis does not reach the sensitive areas of the vagina. Secondly, it is inconvenient and even dangerous: there is a high risk of damaging the penis if you move too sharply.

    Sex in pornography is more like working with a jackhammer: 20 minutes of friction ends with a mediocre imitation of orgasm.Anal sex, as portrayed by pornography, is generally dangerous to be repeated in real life. So please don’t copy pornstars in bed.

    2. Take time to warm up

    An important part of good sex is the duration. These are not hour-long bed fights like in porn. This kind of sex is annoying, exhausting and annoying. The duration of sex does not depend on the length of time that the penis is in the vagina. On the contrary, the ideal penetration time is 7-13 minutes. We are talking about the duration of the entire act of love.

    It’s all about cause-and-effect relationships.

    For a man it is “I am excited, so I will kiss and hug you.” For most women, the opposite is true: sensual contact creates desire.

    Therefore, men often reach orgasm faster than women. The man starts where the woman is just warming up.

    A good foreplay will help. Attempts to “catch the radio” by twisting the unfortunate nipples of a partner, or to eat her ear are not a prelude. A sensitive man knows that a woman has other erogenous zones besides breasts.

    A gentle kiss at the junction of the neck and shoulder can drive a woman crazy. Touching the inner thighs with your fingertips will make you tremble with passion. Take your time to get down to the main course, be patient and take the time to study your partner’s body. The result in the form of fireworks of orgasms is worth it.

    3. Stop thinking with your penis

    Start thinking with your hands and also with your tongue. The biggest mistake men make is to believe that quality sex requires only the right equipment, preferably bigger and thicker.This is enough to make the woman moan with pleasure, and her friends are jealous. This is what porn teaches.

    In reality, a woman sadly studies the ceiling and hopes that you still decide to pay attention to her desires before you turn to the wall and fall asleep.

    It is men who need a penis to orgasm. For women, things can be different. According to some reports, less than 35% of women experience purely vaginal orgasms. For the majority of women (almost 80%), orgasm depends on oral and manual stimulation of the genitals.They do not care about the size and thickness of the penis, the speed and strength of the frictions.

    There are no general recipes. One likes to caress with the tongue, the other likes to touch the fingers, the third likes to be touched with the whole palm. Study the woman and, for heaven’s sake, cut and clean your nails.

    4. Strive for diversity

    Sex kills monotony and monotony. Remember the first months of life together – sex blew the roof. And not because you mastered the postures from the one hundred and fifth page of the Kama Sutra.It’s all about novelty. The human brain needs fresh impressions, new experiences and stimuli. The honeymoon is the time when the brain filled the body with dopamine. Unfortunately, the brain quickly gets used to everything new.

    Boredom sets in too quickly, and what you both were delighted with yesterday is yawning today.

    Good sex needs variety. New positions, caresses, techniques, toys and gadgets – explore the topography of your own bodies and stimulate the brain with new experiences.

    5. Talk to your partner

    High-quality sex does not depend on the penis, but on the man’s brain. A good lover knows that sex is about more than connecting bodies. These are flirting, compliments, teasing touches and – most importantly – words. Chat, discuss wants and needs, ask questions to find out what you like and what annoys you. After all, women love to talk, especially about themselves.

    How to become the best lover in her life by saying just one phrase: morena_morana – LiveJournal


    Plumbers from German porn have ruined many potential romances, ruining them on the very first day.More precisely, on the first night.

    Men look at edited unnatural scenes, with streams of blender and some kind of oatmeal, which they take for a natural physiological substrate.

    Men listen to women’s moans, superimposed by a separate sound track, and eagerly bite their eyes into the hypertrophied charms of the ladies. Men believe.

    If they just masturbated, looking at all this orgy, then nothing. And they believe. They start to doubt themselves. Or, even worse, as an active person, they begin to apply the acquired knowledge in practice.

    For 15 minutes – half an hour they

    eagerly try to reproduce what they filmed for two weeks, and edited another one. What the yogini sword swallowers and other porno circus workers did under anesthetic drugs.

    Women creak, groan, but are silent. In some cases, they even scream unnaturally, fearing to somehow give a rooster. But they are not happy.

    However, they do not scold. Since childhood, they have seen many programs in which it is said that a lover who is offended in the best feelings will take revenge, perhaps even with his feet.Then Ted Bundy, Chikatilo, or even worse will grow out of him. And she will be to blame for the appearance of this monster.

    In addition, smart books on sexology report that if you tell a man in bed what you think about him, then a certain physiological incident can happen to him that can reduce the number of erect members in general in the population. And no one wants this, oddly enough. Not the men, not us.

    Usually we are all silent, like partisans, but today is Friday, and I’m a little drunk.And I am determined to speak the truth and only the truth. I am even ready to blurt out the main female secret, which, probably, can easily change the status of a man from “just some kind of lover” to “the best lover in the world”.

    In short, listen here, guys.

    If she is still sober enough to hear you (and if not, then put her back urgently), if she is still naked enough not to flutter out of bed at the same moment, if she is still young enough to take oral speech without a hearing aid, just tell her this: I will remember you forever.

    Although no … Like this, in caps:

    I WILL REMEMBER YOU FOREVER

    Run your hand over her chest, whatever it may be. The curves of her waist. Blow on her navel and repeat:
    THANKS YOU. I WILL REMEMBER YOU FOREVER

    All, you are the best lover of all times and peoples. You are beyond competition. All her ex, present and future nervously smoke in the toilet corners of memory.

    P.S … While I was sleeping in the post they already told me everything they think about it. An important point to make.You don’t have to tell your partner with whom you have been married for 15 years or are going to. You’re not an idiot!

    This is a format when, in the interiors of a beautiful hotel, a beautiful lady out of mischief gives a boy his first night of love, for example. And he runs away into the fog, and he sadly says this phrase.
    Or when two met somewhere in Anapa, and both families have home … And here they are in a room under the air conditioner, after hot sex, and then.
    Or when tomorrow she will fly to America. And not when borscht is at home and that’s all.

    How to Become a Good Lover. Man and Woman: The Art of Love

    How to Become a Good Lover

    “When I love a woman, I only think about how to please her.”

    Prince Ali Khan

    A good lover in the mind of a woman is not one who can “often and for a long time”, but one with whom she feels good. If a man wants his partner to experience the greatest pleasure, then mastering the sexual technique is not a problem, there is nothing difficult and impossible in this.

    The altruistic partner gets pleasure from the consciousness that he has given pleasure to the woman.

    Polls of modern women show that they do not like male males who lash out like a primitive man and satisfy their sexual needs, neglecting the sensations of a woman. In the west, these men are called “macho”. We do not have an everyday definition of such a category of men. In sexopathology, this is called a genital type of behavior (from the word “genitals” – genitals, that is, fixation only on sexual contact and ignoring the emotional and spiritual richness of the relationship between a man and a woman).

    A woman who knows a lot about men and sex will never become the mistress of a silent male with an “iron” erection. Good sex is a virtuoso game between two good partners.

    The first essential quality of a good lover is the ability to speak words of love and tenderness.

    Modern women consider a man to be a good lover, who can make them feel his attention and enjoy. Moreover, emotional satisfaction for women is no less important than physical satisfaction.

    “There is no woman in the world who would resist the constant display of signs of attention”

    Giacomo Casanova

    One of the main qualities of a good lover is the ability to satisfy the emotional needs of a woman.

    A lover who knows how to maintain an exciting relationship is an unrivaled lover!

    This can be achieved by examining a wide range of sexual activity.

    It is important to be not only sexy but also sensual.The wrong tactic is to regard erotic caresses as a means to arouse a partner. If you treat foreplay as a burdensome duty, as a “necessary ritual” before intercourse, then, most likely, nothing will work out. Even an experienced and experienced partner in sexual technique cannot achieve mechanical stimulation of the erogenous zones so that the partner soars to the peak of bliss. A woman is not a sex machine that you just need to press or pet where you need to. Hugs, kisses and erotic caresses should not be seen as just a prelude to bed.They should demonstrate your attitude towards your partner.

    A good lover does not set himself the goal of increasing the number of his “love victories”; he is interested not in quantity, but in the quality of sexual relations with a woman.

    Knowledge of the theory of sexual technique is necessary (for those who need information – in this book it is given), but it must be applied creatively. If you do not feel feelings for your partner, if she is one of the many on the list of your “love victories” for you, then you should not even try.Perhaps she will pretend and feign an orgasm, but she will not like your caresses.

    A woman feels the subtle nuances of emotional relationships intuitively, and she cannot be deceived even with high sexual techniques. A man can experience an orgasm during intercourse or oral sex with a partner who is indifferent to him and to whom he himself has no feelings, and a woman will not be satisfied with intimacy with a partner to whom she is indifferent.

    A good lover himself gets pleasure from caressing a woman.

    If a man dissolves in caresses, if a woman’s reaction gives him the joy of possession, and satisfaction from her pleasure, and the awareness of his unlimited power over her body and feelings, and pleasure from this, then this means that he is a sexual altruist. And an altruist is the best lover.

    A good lover enjoyed sex both for the pleasure he received and for the satisfaction he himself provided.

    Erotic caresses can excite and satisfy almost any woman, with the exception of truly frigid ones, which are actually very few among the total number of women.If a woman is not satisfied with intimacy, then she has a bad sexual partner who does not meet her needs or even failed to awaken her sensuality.

    A good lover is one who has had as many orgasms as his partner. “A lover with a quality mark” is one who gives a partner the opportunity to experience more orgasms than he does.

    The most important thing is harmony in feelings and in sexual relations. If there is no feeling, then soon the sexual attraction to a woman also disappears.

    Sexual intercourse is just one way to express your feelings.

    Genuine sex is love.

    90,000 Sexual advice from women. How can a man become a good lover?

    Women told what they expect from men in sex, as well as how to become a good lover. Life is too short to work in a job you hate, date ugly girls, and have bad sex.

    Women have compiled a memo to men, which should help them become excellent lovers, and make sex unforgettable. Sex is the foundation of the relationship between a man and a woman. If it’s bad, then problems are guaranteed. Women expect high-quality sex and vivid orgasms from men, even if it’s sex for one night.

    How can a man become a good lover?

    1. Is the date full of flirtation, romance and sexual tension? Good sex happens when it starts from afar.

    2. Most of the time, sex needs a comfortable and private place where the girl can relax and feel safe.

    3. In 95% of cases, the girl herself will not pounce on the man and take off her panties. A man should take the initiative and perseverance himself if he wants to get sex.

    4. Alcohol dulls the girl’s modesty and “cockroaches”. A little alcohol relaxes and makes sex more crazy.

    5. An experienced lover does not forget about foreplay.It takes the girl some time to get wet and open up for more.

    6. During sex, kiss her more often on the neck, shoulders, chest and other accessible parts of the body.

    7. When a man remembers a woman’s erogenous points and uses them, he can be called a professional.

    8. Having a big penis does not mean professionalism in sex. The presence of a medium or small penis does not mean unprofessional sex.

    9. Do not rush into sex and do not be like an anxious rabbit.Let the girl move to her own rhythm of passion.

    10. A good lover remembers the clitoris and its caresses. Most women expect this from a man. Caress with your hands, dick, tongue or toy.

    11. Compliments, the language of passion and vulgar words in a woman’s ear make women stronger.

    12. Girls like groin groin and makes a member visually larger. Well-groomed athletic body will also play into the hands.

    13. Let her reach an orgasm before you, and not frustratedly feign an orgasm.

    14. A good lover is always ready to try new poses, toys, ideas, costumes and fantasies.

    Better to be a good lover than to be a cuckold. How good are you at sex?

    Veronica Larsson, all author’s books: 49 books

    Veronica Larsson

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    Simple and Funny Male Masturbation Tips

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    Romantic evening. Perfect Sex Evening

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    General Psychology

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    Aversion to sex. Causes and treatment

    Veronica Larsson

    General Psychology

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    Sexual aversion (sexual aversion or anorexia is a mental disorder) – negative feelings in relation to sexual intercourse, expressed so much that it leads to avoidance of sexual activity.Some even say that sexual anorexia can be called disgust or ho . ..

    6 real ways to enlarge your penis. Injections, stretchers, tablets, visual, diet

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    General Psychology

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    Living in a society in early adolescence where heterosexuality is the only acceptable and correct sexual behavior, we can understand how difficult it is for a gay man to accept himself without fear of rejection. Family, friends or even his job. There is a widespread belief about who chooses l…

    Sex during the coronavirus epidemic.Stress, infection, panic, pleasure, health

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    Sex, epidemic, coronavirus. Sex during the epidemic. It gives exactly what we need most during the coronavirus epidemic: it reduces stress levels and improves mood, boosts immunity and has a beneficial effect on many aspects of our health, perfectly relaxes and soothes anxiety …

    Female bisexuality.Freud, Greek legends, psychology

    Veronica Larsson

    General Psychology

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    Freud’s clever concept of using Greek mythology to create psychoanalytic theory paved the way for an endless material of myths where he loves to hide the unconscious. The symbolism of each myth plays a key role in analytical thinking, so that the manifestations and functions of the unconscious …

    Erotic dreams.Key to knowing yourself

    Veronica Larsson

    General Psychology

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    Dreaming, sleep, erotic dreams, sexual dreams, intimate relationships, the meaning of sleep, erection, orgasm, arousal, fantasy. Dreams are the key to knowing our own erotic potential, they provide valuable guidance and can enrich our sex life. Any dream has a certain meaning …

    How to recognize a good lover.Sex, lover, bed, pleasure

    Veronica Larsson

    General Psychology

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    Why girls are negative about rape. Male and female points of view

    Veronica Larsson

    General Psychology

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    Why do men dream of being raped by a woman, while girls are terrified of being raped? In the book we will consider both the female and male points of view on these issues.Complexes, dreams and fantasies, prejudices … …

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    What and when to buy in Italy.Shopping tour, Prada, collections, linen

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    In Italy, everyone walks beautiful and smart not because they have a heightened sense of style, but because things are several times cheaper than in the places where they are imported. Sometimes the Italian woman is faced with the question: what to buy – a pack of cigarettes or a sweater in Zara? Of course, the most ideal shopping tour option is from …

    Why is it a shame to have sex in the light? What are men ashamed of and what are women

    Veronica Larsson

    General Psychology

    Missing

    In the book, you will learn the root causes of this shame.Together we will look at why many women refuse to have sex in the light and during the day, how to overcome stiffness and much more … .. .

    How to determine the size of a member by appearance. Types and shapes of penises by height and face

    Veronica Larsson

    General Psychology

    Missing

    Literally every woman is afraid of unpleasant disappointment in the size of the penis of her chosen one. On many thematic women’s forums, tens of thousands of messages have been written about how to determine the size of the penis of a beloved man.And there is nothing wrong with that. This book will tell you in detail …

    Sexual incompatibility. Incompatibility in bed. Signs. Solutions …

    Veronica Larsson

    Health

    Missing

    Most often, this term refers to a situation when one of the partners, or both of them, do not feel satisfaction when having sex. That is why there is no harmony in sexual relations. “Incompatible” partners may experience discomfort, anger and irritation, moral suffering or …

    Alternative sex. Varieties and features

    Veronica Larsson

    Entertainment

    Missing

    Throughout their existence, people have come up with many types of sex, which at first glance, they can simply replace the classic vaginal intercourse. Indeed, fellatio, cunnilingus, anal sex, petting with deep penetration, masturbation of mutual penetration and many other miscellaneous …

    Size matters.Does penis size matter …

    Veronica Larsson

    Entertainment

    Missing

    In fact, it turns out that all the details about male potency and the size of dignity are of interest to the partner no less, but rather even more than the man himself. Accordingly, it is interesting to figure out, having such important parameters in service, which, according to the female opinion, correspond to the ideal? …

    Does a woman enjoy cunnilingus? Women’s gaze, techniques, features

    Veronica Larsson

    Health

    Missing

    What exactly is cunnilingus? What techniques for its execution exist? Could he be unpleasant to a woman? And how exactly do you know that she is enjoying herself? The answers to these questions are below. Cunnilingus is undoubtedly a powerful technique for arousing a woman …

    Nationalities, races and penis sizes. Determination by facial features, methods of magnification

    Veronica Larsson

    Entertainment

    Missing

    Excessive size of the male member is attributed to representatives of the Negroid race. However, such views are exaggerated. But the size of the penis in male representatives of American Indians is amazing.In length, it has average parameters, but it has exactly the same thickness in girth. Slightly about …

    Nudism. How to practice nudism?

    Veronica Larsson

    Health

    Missing

    Do not think that in this form a person will be alone. No, there will also be new acquaintances with the same people who will share common interests. Therefore, in such places you can even meet your love or find a friend.They will not condemn for such behavior, but will only support that . ..

    Enhanced orgasm. Techniques and techniques

    Veronica Larsson

    Health

    Missing

    “Acceptance” of an orgasm for each individual person is different. Most often, a man at this peak moment freezes for a while, enjoying his own pleasure … And a woman … …

    13 female thoughts during sex.What are they thinking about?

    Veronica Larsson

    General Psychology

    Missing

    A woman’s way of thinking is significantly different from that of a man. That is why sometimes, in the midst of a passionate bed scene, a woman no, no, and will give out some kind of conclusion “in the order of delirium.” The man is shocked. And in order to explain to him the whole chain of feminine logic, which led her happy …

    Endurance in sex.Recommendations, facts, research

    Veronica Larsson

    Manuals

    Missing

    But isn’t it good when the premature ejaculation occurs a little later, and not quickly. In this case, the man would have heightened confidence in his abilities, and then the man could stay in the game as much as he wanted. …

    Sex Revolution. Sexual revolutions in the history of human society

    Veronica Larsson

    Biographies and Memoirs

    Missing

    Since the middle of the 2nd century BCNS. Rome already has an idea of ​​the ethical norms of the Greek countries in the east. On this basis, moral freedom begins to develop rapidly. But real lust among the Romans appears only in the 1st century A.D. BC, when the Roman emperor Caligula declared himself true during his lifetime …

    Female complaints during oral sex. What might they not like?

    Veronica Larsson

    Manuals

    Missing

    Today, many women are only interested in one question – what might they not like during sex? What can cause negative emotions? …

    Psychology of love.Causes, research, hormones, effects, facts

    Veronica Larsson

    Contemporary romance novels

    Missing

    It appears suddenly and can also disappear. She has a different color and can have a completely opposite effect on a person’s life. For some, love becomes a positive creative force that gives inspiration and enthusiasm for doing things. Others are tormented by love, turning their own with …

    The attitude of men and women to group sex.Research Facts

    Veronica Larsson

    General Psychology

    Missing

    Group sex is considered the prerogative of couples who have long been in sincere and trusting relationships. It is with his help that they try to diversify their intimate life. Also, in group sex, people who are free of obligations at the moment are most often involved. In general, to meet a couple who would …

    7 male erogenous zones.Practical guide

    Veronica Larsson

    Health

    Missing

    No matter how strange the erogenous zones described above may seem, it is certainly worth trying to diversify your sex life with their help. After all, only by trying to stimulate them, you can understand what kind of deafening, in a good way, effect such actions can have. Possibly skillful wives …

    First sex with a new partner.Subtleties and nuances

    Veronica Larsson

    Contemporary romance novels

    Missing

    It is clear that each person has a completely unique experience, a set of habits and features of physical preferences, which is why each new sexual partner has to build appropriate relationships from scratch. However, there are some general rules that should be taken into account to ensure that the process …

    Multiple female orgasm.Methods to achieve

    Veronica Larsson

    General Psychology

    Missing

    Of course, a high-quality orgasm has an extremely positive effect on the female body. First of all, this is a psychological influence: sleep improves, stress is relieved, depressive states go away. .. .

    Unusual facts about sex.

    weird and interesting truths about sex

    Veronica Larsson

    Entertainment

    Missing

    According to the survey, it was found that almost 6% of people have not yet had sexual intercourse in a non-alcoholic state.The most important reasons for intimacy while intoxicated are the desire for courage and romance during intimacy. But, according to scientists, some …

    Simulated orgasm. How to determine?

    Veronica Larsson

    Health

    Missing

    According to statistics, almost all men would like to learn how to determine how the other half gets an orgasm. How to determine this? Read in our manual ……

    Not a “log” in bed with a man.Sex lessons. The best in bed, how to become …

    Veronica Larsson

    Manuals

    Missing

    An important and useful manual for women. Secrets for women. How to Become a Good Lover? This guide was written by a girl with extensive experience in sex and good taste in intimate relationships. The topic of the manual: fantasy, passion, sexy lingerie, games, initiative, physical fitness. From “modest …

    How to choose the right erotic lingerie.Beautiful, Sexy, Special Occasion

    Veronica Larsson

    Entertainment

    Missing

    Sooner or later, it is time for almost every girl to choose erotic underwear. And this task is by no means easy, because the impression that it will make in him depends on the right choice. Naturally, one wants to look just perfect. …

    How to have sex all night. How to have sex for 2-3 hours without interruption all night

    Veronica Larsson

    Health

    Missing

    The ability to make love all night long does not depend on the physical capabilities of the man, but on the sexual mood, the correct foreplay, the woman’s ability to gently arouse her man….

    How to understand that you fell out of love / fell out of love. How to understand that it’s time for you to change your partner or yourself

    Veronica Larsson

    Contemporary Russian literature

    Missing

    A loving man understands that a woman, as a rule, is an impulsive and changeable nature. She needs all sorts of bows and hugs. And he is ready to give it to her with joy. And also to provide the necessary sexual foreplay, although he does not really need it.If a man is jarred by talking about normal needs …

    Male masturbation. Pros and cons of

    Veronica Larsson

    General Psychology

    Missing

    Oddly enough, contrary to popular public opinion, self-satisfaction has not only pluses, but also minuses. For example, gradual depravity and sexual degradation. In this manual you will find all the answers. It is useful to read for both men and women in order to better understand psychology and about …

    Squirt.The whole truth about the jet orgasm in girls. Personal female experience

    Veronica Larsson

    Contemporary romance novels

    Missing

    Squirt – theory and practice of the most mysterious female orgasm. In this manual, you will learn how squirt differs from other types of orgasms, how to help your partner reach it, advice to women on how to achieve it quickly. Myths and truth about squirt, observation history, personal experience, etc. …

    The art of anal sex.20 techniques and other secrets of caress

    Veronica Larsson

    Contemporary romance novels

    Missing

    Why does the girl not agree to such an intimacy with you? Because you are physically hurting her. But this type of intimacy is possible only with pleasant sensations! In the manual: How to properly talk to a girl about such intimacy, prepare her body, please … …

    17 types of female orgasm that few people know about.And everything about them

    Veronica Larsson

    Health

    Missing

    In fact, a lady is capable of experiencing up to 17 subspecies of orgasm. No, this is not absurd, it is actually so. The thing is that often men do not understand the body of their own beloved, and the girls themselves do not really understand their own body, which is fraught with a large number of erogenous zones, especially in . ..

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    Veronica Larsson

    Contemporary romance novels

    Missing

    Do you want to control men through sex? Strive to stay in his heart forever, like the best girl in his life? To do this, you need to know what kind of women men like in bed. Did you know that the “rider” pose is a favorite with men? Master the art of this pose and discover all the nuances of pr …

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    Veronica Larsson

    Contemporary romance novels

    Missing

    There is no shame in a threesome. But the level of trust between partners must be high. In the manual: how to offer your girlfriend / wife sex for three, the best positions, features of FFM and FFM, pros and cons, and much more. …

    How to bring a girl to orgasm. Sex training. How to satisfy a woman in bed?

    Veronica Larsson

    Manuals

    Missing

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    Veronica Larsson

    Medicine

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    The G-point is called “gynecological UFO” by some scientists, because until now, since the discovery of this zone in a woman’s vagina in 1944 and the publication of material in 1950 by gynecologist Ernst Grefenberg, they do not believe in its existence. Other scientists agree with their colleague, believing that inside a woman’s …

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    Veronica Larsson

    Contemporary Russian literature

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    Veronica Larsson

    Contemporary Russian literature

    Missing

    Psychologists talk about a crisis after 7 years of marriage, sexologists – about a break in relationships after the first year, then – in the third or fourth year, when the novelty and freshness of erotic sensations go away, and the partner loses its former sexual attractiveness. However, the situation can be corrected, because two loving people …

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    Veronica Larsson

    Medicine

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    Sex Tips for Beginners. What to expect the first time? How to start. Does it hurt? Chances of pregnancy. Female orgasm. Poses for beginners. Sex toys for dummies. And much more. Instructions, rules in sex for guys and girls. The right start of sex and the right sex life. …

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    Veronica Larsson

    Manuals

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    Seduction and seduction of a man: secret techniques. In the manual, we will consider the main secrets of hunting for guys, which allow you to get almost any man into your networks. In fact, it is much easier for a woman to seduce and fall in love with a man than a guy with a girl. The most important weapon is slenderness …

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    Veronica Larsson

    Health

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    If you want to quickly learn to have an orgasm – this manual will help you. You will learn to be properly aroused, to stimulate the necessary zones, to get an orgasm without a man, without even touching yourself with your hands, to “order” an orgasm in a dream. The manual can also be useful for men to understand why their …

    90,000 How to Become a Good Lover: 5 Tips from Women 1.Forget what you saw in porn
    The first rule of a good lover is: Forget everything that porn films teach. No, porn itself is even useful if it is a joint warm-up with a partner before the main game. It’s just that porn teaches the wrong things. The way it happens in porn videos does not happen in life. An analogy can be drawn to movies about sports: you wouldn’t learn karate from Bruce Lee’s films, would you?

    Porn films are work for the camera, not the desire to please a partner, not making love.

    Take the Backward Rider pose. This is ideal for the operator: the process is at a glance, there is no need to perform miracles of acrobatics to capture a spicy look. In reality, not the best choice. First, the penis does not reach the sensitive areas of the vagina. Secondly, it is inconvenient and even dangerous: there is a high risk of damaging the penis if you move too sharply.

    Sex in pornography is more like working with a jackhammer: 20 minutes of friction ends with a mediocre imitation of orgasm.Anal sex, as portrayed by pornography, is generally dangerous to be repeated in real life. So please don’t copy pornstars in bed.

    2. Take time to warm up
    An important part of good sex is duration. These are not hour-long bed fights like in porn. This kind of sex is annoying, exhausting and annoying. The duration of sex does not depend on the length of time that the penis is in the vagina. On the contrary, the ideal penetration time is 7-13 minutes. We are talking about the duration of the entire act of love.

    It’s all about cause-and-effect relationships.

    For a man it is “I am excited, so I will kiss and hug you.” For most women, the opposite is true: sensual contact creates desire.

    Therefore, men often reach orgasm faster than women. The man starts where the woman is just warming up.

    A good foreplay will help. Attempts to “catch the radio” by twisting the unfortunate nipples of a partner, or to eat her ear are not a prelude. A sensitive man knows that a woman has other erogenous zones besides breasts.

    A gentle kiss at the junction of the neck and shoulder can drive a woman crazy. Touching the inner thighs with your fingertips will make you tremble with passion. Take your time to get down to the main course, be patient and take the time to study your partner’s body. The result in the form of fireworks of orgasms is worth it.

    3. Stop thinking with your penis
    Start thinking with your hands and also with your tongue. The biggest mistake men make is to believe that quality sex requires only the right equipment, preferably bigger and thicker.This is enough to make the woman moan with pleasure, and her friends are jealous. This is what porn teaches.

    In reality, a woman sadly studies the ceiling and hopes that you still decide to pay attention to her desires before you turn to the wall and fall asleep.

    It is men who need a penis to orgasm. For women, things can be different. According to some reports, less than 35% of women experience purely vaginal orgasms. For the majority of women (almost 80%), orgasm depends on oral and manual stimulation of the genitals.They do not care about the size and thickness of the penis, the speed and strength of the frictions.

    There are no general recipes. One likes to caress with the tongue, the other likes to touch the fingers, the third likes to be touched with the whole palm. Study the woman and, for heaven’s sake, cut and clean your nails.

    4. Strive for diversity
    Sex kills monotony and monotony. Remember the first months of life together – sex blew the roof. And not because you mastered the postures from the one hundred and fifth page of the Kama Sutra.It’s all about novelty. The human brain needs fresh impressions, new experiences and stimuli. The honeymoon is the time when the brain filled the body with dopamine. Unfortunately, the brain quickly gets used to everything new.

    Boredom sets in too quickly, and what you both were delighted with yesterday is yawning today.

    Good sex needs variety. New positions, caresses, techniques, toys and gadgets – explore the topography of your own bodies and stimulate the brain with new experiences.

    5. Talk to your partner
    High-quality sex does not depend on the penis, but on the man’s brain. A good lover knows that sex is about more than connecting bodies. These are flirting, compliments, teasing touches and – most importantly – words. Chat, discuss wants and needs, ask questions to find out what you like and what annoys you. After all, women love to talk, especially about themselves.

    90,000 Read online “How to bring a girl to orgasm.Sex training “- by Veronica Larsson

    An important and useful manual for men. How to Become a Good Lover? All the secrets in my book for men. Unlike many other guides, this guide is written by a girl with a lot of experience in sex and good taste in intimate relationships. Who else but a woman knows what we like in bed and what we don’t!

    After reading, you will learn all the secrets of women and learn how to deliver incredible pleasure in sex to wives, mistresses, married women and girls.Tips and tricks for intimacy. She will definitely love it!

    Introductory part

    The most important rules!

    a) you should be gentle with her

    b) be able to feel her body and anticipate desires.

    Most women prefer romance and missionary position with kissing lips, face, ears, neck, chest. Almost none of the girls likes BDSM and dirty “sweet tricks for guys” from porn. Only if the partner herself asks for a pose from behind or grab her by the neck or hair.

    No sharp entrances to the anus without warning and slaps on the butt!

    Or the woman will just get the impression that you are a narrow-minded guy who does not crawl out of porn sites.

    Topics that we will consider in this manual:

    Prelude and Atmosphere.

    Something that men should definitely not do in bed.

    Male myths and misconceptions about female pleasure.

    Tips and tricks for sex. She will definitely love it!

    The most acceptable and favorite positions for women.

    Ideal duration of intercourse for a woman.

    My partner is not getting an orgasm, how can I help her?

    Is penis size important for a girl or not?

    “After-party”.

    Foreplay – an important stage in sex

    Foreplay begins not with caresses and undressing, but long before that. The sweetest sex is sex for love or passion. To do this, you need to have time to fall in love with a girl / woman. To make her want you.

    Don’t drag your friend to bed on the first date! Even if she herself asks for intimacy on the first date! Whatever the great sex, in the future, it will cause unpleasant sensations in her.For example, you may think that in your eyes you are unworthy of courtship and romantic attention, but only looks like for sex.

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