Chinese betrothal gifts: The complete Guo Da Li or Chinese betrothal ceremony checklist based on your dialect group

Chinese Wedding Traditions: Checklist for Betrothal Ceremony

The Guo Da Li (過大禮)or the traditional betrothal ceremony is an important Chinese wedding custom that happens between fifteen to twenty days, or up to two months before the wedding. During this ceremony, the groom’s family presents the Pin Jin (聘金/ 禮金) and betrothal gifts to the bride’s family as a symbolism of the groom’s sincerity towards the marriage and assurance that he will care for his bride-to-be. The bride and her family’s acceptance of the Pin Jin and betrothal gifts means that the proposal is accepted, and the marriage, approved. Upon the acceptance of the Pin Jin and betrothal gifts, the bride’s family will also reciprocate the gesture by returning part of the Pin Jin and some gifts. This custom is known as Hui Li (回禮). What does the groom need to prepare for the Guo Da Li and what does the bride return during the Hui Li? Here’s a guide and checklist for you to make sure you don’t miss out on any item for your betrothal ceremony. You can also download a your own copy at the end of the article.

[Photo via yocosha]

 

Traditional Betrothal Ceremony

 

Here are the items the bride and her family returns.

  • Around half of the Betrothal Gift, including Coconuts, Sweet Beginnings, Jin Guo, Wine, Fruits and Tea Leaves
  • Part of the Pin Jin. Prepare an all-inclusive envelope with a certain amount of money and a red envelope for bride’s price with the number 9 in the balance amount, which means the their love will last forever.
  • A Red Envelope for the Son-in-law. Alongside this, a pair of shoes, a wallet, suit, and belt will be given.
  • Plants for good luck: Yams, Ginger plants, lotus tuber with roots and pine tree leafs
  • Wedding pastry for return: Fa Gao (發糕)

 

[Photo via rosalierosie]

 

Modern Betrothal Ceremony

Since there are quite a lot of things to be prepared in the traditional betrothal process, couples nowadays practice a simpler version wherein the groom purchases the betrothal set and just needs to prepare the bride’s price or Pin Jin, the “seafood red pocket money”(海味金), and “Three Livestocks Red Pocket Money”(三牲金).  It’s important to note that all the red pocket money should be in pairs or even numbers to symbolize good luck and fortune for the  couple. Also, if the groom doesn’t want to miss anything, he can add a pair of “Everything All-in-one Red Pocket Money”(包羅萬有利是).

 

[Photo via mattaboutfood]

 

 

 

Here are the items for the Hui Li.

  • Around Half of the Betrothal Gift including Coconuts, Sweet Beginnings, Jin Guo, Wine, Fruits and Tea Leaves
  • Wedding Pastry for Return: Fa Gao (發糕)
  • Laisee for the Groom. This is given in replacement of his gifts.

 

Feel free to download the checklist in PDF version here: Betrothal Ceremony Checklist

Stay tuned for our next article. We will continue to explore more about the Betrothal Ceremony!

Tagged: Betrothal Ceremony / checklist / Chinese wedding traditions

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All About the Chinese Betrothal Ceremony

Chinese wedding traditions make up an important part of a couple’s whole journey towards their Big Day. Each and every custom is full of meaning and keeps the rich culture of the family alive as it’s passed on generation after generation. The Chinese betrothal ceremony is a tradition that opens the couple’s journey because it includes the formal act of proposal by the groom, and acceptance by the bride and her family. Here’s what you need to know about this important ceremony.

The Process

[From: Ravishing Romance / Photo: MC Photography]

The Guo Da Li (過大禮) usually takes place between fifteen and twenty days before the wedding. The groom’s family first selects an auspicious date for the ceremony. On this day he, along with his family, will go to the bride’s place to present the bride’s gifts, also commonly known as Pin Jin (聘金/ 禮金), and betrothal gifts.

Upon arriving at the bride’s house, the groom enters with the gifts while his family and other relatives wait outside until the ceremony finishes. The groom expresses his intentions for the bride to her parents and presents the gifts he has at hand. This gesture symbolizes the groom’s sincerity about marrying the bride and his gifts represent that he is well-capable of and serious about taking care of the bride. While this is happening, the bride remains in her room and waits until the ceremony is over to keep the good fortune.

As an act of acceptance, the bride’s parents will return some of the Pin Jin and gifts to the groom. This is known as Hui Li (回禮). The conclusion of the Hui Li marks the end of the ceremony. The groom will emerge from the bride’s house and head home with his family. With the completion of the betrothal ceremony, the couple can formally announce their engagement by sending out their invitations.

Here is a step-by-step guide for the Guo Da Li and Hui Li.

Step 1:
Make sure the gifts are all prepared. Bring them to the bride’s home.

Step 2:
The groom’s team can include groomsmen and his relatives, usually an even number. The bride’s parents and relatives can wait at bride’s home.  A Chinese Wedding Master(大妗姐), a person who officiates the ceremony, will be responsible for opening the gifts and presenting them to the bride’s family.

Step 3:
When the groom’s team arrives, the bride’s parents will come out to the door to receive the Pin Jin or cash gift laisee first. Then everyone will go into the house.

Step 4:
The master will give all the betrothal wishes and blessings to the bride while he or she is handing the gifts to the bride.

Step 5:
The bride’s side returns a set of gifts to the groom’s side. This concludes the ceremony.

[From: Ravishing Romance / Photo: MC Photography]

 

Tips and Do’s & Don’ts

  • Traditionally, the bride and groom cannot join this ceremony, but nowadays, couples want to be part of this ceremony. So the groom can enter the bride’s home at last, and the bride can wait inside her room until everything is done.
  • The point above also applies to both the bride’s and the groom’s parents. They can stay outside or in the room until the ceremony is done.
  • Discuss the gift list with both sides of parents in advance. The betrothal ceremony is very important to them as this is the Chinese engagement. Make sure to check with them and see how much they want to follow the traditions.
  • Check when you should hold the ceremony. Other than it’s usually held 14 to 60 days before the actual wedding day, it’s best to check the lucky date and time according to the Chinese calendar.
  • If you are not hiring a Chinese wedding master, the ceremony may be conducted by one of the groom’s relatives with ‘good fortune’. He or she will lead the gift presentation.
  • Some Chinese pastry companies offer free rental service of the traditional wooden boxes for all these gifts. As they are limited, try to ask and book in advance.

[From: Forever and Always / Photo: Steven C Photography]

At last, it’s official! And once the betrothal ceremony is done, why not invite everyone for lunch or dinner together? This is a good time for family to start bonding!

To read about the list of gifts for the betrothal ceremony, click here.

Important Steps | Le Knot

In our modern context, this laborious process of unification between

two families has been simplified into these important steps:

Betrothal Gifts (娉礼/过大礼)

 

The betrothal gifts are prepared based on the bride and groom’s dialect groups and is sent to the bride’s family to confirm the marriage agreement between the two families. Le Knot a Chinese Wedding Shop in Singapore can help you with this.

In the olden days, the value of the betrothal gifts determines the financial stability of the groom.

It is a traditional way of thanking and showing respect to the bride’s parents for raising the bride, and a desire to forge good relations with the future parent-in-laws. In accepting the gifts, the bride’s parents formally pledge her to the groom.


Return Gifts(回礼)

 

Upon receipt of the betrothal gifts from the groom, the bride’s family reciprocates the generous gesture by returning a portion of the gifts. This plays a significant role in suggesting that the groom’s family is overly generous, that the bride’s family is not greedy, and most importantly, that the two families will share their good fortune.

Bridal cakes received from the groom’s family is usually distributed to friends and relatives as a form of announcement and invitation to the upcoming wedding banquet.


Bride’s Dowry(嫁妆)

 

The dowry represents the wealth and prosperity of the bride’s family and is also a firm display of the bride’s family’s love for their daughter; it encases within the blessings for their daughter and future son-in-law.


Bed Setting(安床)

 

This essential practice is done to bless the bride and groom with good health, and an abundance of fortune and offspring.


Hair Combing(上头)

 

The traditional hair combing ritual is a practice where the parents will comb their children’s hair as a symbolic way for them to move on to the next stage of life in adulthood.

Auspicious blessings are uttered with each stroke so as to bless the marriage and their children’s future.


Done on the Wedding day:

Fetching the Bride (接新娘)

 

The climax of the wedding is when the groom and groomsmen arrive at the bride’s home to pick up the bride. The groom’s side would “bribe” the bridesmaids with lucky money in red packet in order to get through the “wedding door” and take the bride away from her original household. When the groom crosses the threshold, the bridesmaids will bring the bride to her father so that the father-of-the-bride can give her away. After the groom and bride greet each other, they have to bow to the Heaven and the Earth, their ancestors and then serve tea to the bride’s parents.

At this time, the bride should also prepare three red packets, which symbolize the prosperity of her relatives, her respect for the ancestors and her ability to bring forth many descendants respectively, for the new mother-in-law awaiting for her arrival at the groom’s house.


Arriving at Groom‘s place and Tea ceremony (过门, 敬茶)

 

The tea ceremony is the most significant event in a modern chinese wedding. This is the time when the newly arrived bride meets other members of the groom’s family.

Again, the new couple should show their respect by bowing to the Heaven and the Earth, their ancestors and kneel down to serve tea to their parents.

Upon the delivery of their blessings, the groom’s parents will present the couple with red packets and give jewelries or gifts to the bride…

Afterwards, the couple should serve tea to other senior relatives before lunch.


Bride‘s Home visit (三朝回门)

 

Three days after the wedding ceremony, the newly wedded couple should return to the bride’s home with a whole roasted pig that signifies the bride’s chastity, together with wine, chicken, cakes, fruits, egg E-fu noodles, pork tripe and pork etc… The bride’s family will reward the groom with gifts that is worth half of what he bought. However, many people choose to simplify this procedure nowadays and have the bride return home on the wedding day in the afternoon before the banquet begins in the evening.

The groom is introduced to the bride’s family at the tea ceremony during the bride’s home visit. The bride’s mother’s wedding tea set, if available, is used for this ceremony. Otherwise, any nice tea set can be used.


Wedding Banquet (宴席)

 

A wedding banquet is a lunch or dinner held after the completion of a marriage ceremony.

While the wedding itself is often based on the couple’s choices, the wedding banquets are a gesture of “thanks” and appreciation, to those that have raised the bride and groom (such as grandparents and uncles). It is also to ensure the relatives on each side meet the relatives on the other side. Thus out of respect for the elders, wedding banquets are usually done formally and traditionally, which the older generation is thought to be more comfortable with.

Chinese wedding banquets are traditionally paid for by the groom’s parents. The bride’s parents and relatives are invited guests.

It is traditional for the bride’s parents to ask for a few tables at the wedding banquet during the wedding negotiations. It is considered as part of the bride’s price.

Modern day financially independent bride and groom will also pay for their own tables for inviting their friends and colleagues.


Three Letters and Six Etiquette of Chinese Traditional Wedding

Chinese marriage was systemized into custom in the Warring States period (402-221 B.C.). Due to the long history, there are different customs to follow in different places. Although they are generally the same, visitors still get chance to witness traditional marriages in the countryside.


In the ancient times, it was very important to follow a basic principle of Three Letters and Six Etiquette since they were essential to a marriage.

 

Three letters


Three letters include Betrothal Letter, Gift Letter and Wedding Letter. Betrothal Letter is the formal document of the engagement, a must in a marriage. Then a gift letter is necessary, which will be enclosed to the identified bride’s family, listing types and quantity of gifts for the wedding once both parties accept the marriage. While the Wedding Letter refers to the document which will be prepared and presented to the bride’s family on the day of the wedding to confirm and commemorate the formal acceptance of the bride into the bridegroom’s family.

 

Six Etiquette


Proposing:


If parents of a young man identify a woman as their future daughter-in-law. Then they will find a matchmaker. Proposal used to be practiced by a matchmaker. The matchmaker would formally present his or her client’s request to the identified woman’s parents.

 

Birthday matching:


If the potential bride’s parents did not object the marriage. the matchmaker would ask for the girl’s birthday and birth hour record to assure the compatibility of the potential bride and bridegroom. If the couple’s birthdays and birth hours does not conflict according to astrology. The marriage will step into the next stage. Once there is any conflict, meaning the marriage will bring disasters to the man’s family or the woman’s. So the marriage stops here.

 

Presenting betrothal gifts:


Once birthdays match, the bridegroom’s family will then arrange the matchmaker to present betrothal gifts, enclosing the betrothal letter to the bride’s family.

 

Presenting wedding gifts:


After the betrothal letter and betrothal gifts are accepted. The bridegroom’s family will later formally send wedding gifts to the bride’s family. Usually, gifts may include tea, lotus seeds, longan, red beans, green beans, red dates, nutmeg, oranges, pomegranate, lily, bridal cakes, coconuts, wine, red hair braid, money box and other stuffs. It depends on local customs and family wealth.

 

Picking auspicious wedding date:


An astrologist or astrology book will be referred to selecting an auspicious date to hold the wedding ceremony.

 

 

Wedding ceremony:


On the selected day, the bridegroom departs with a troop of escorts and musicians, which will play happy music all the way to the bride’s home. After the bride is clustered to the bridegroom’s home, the wedding ceremony begins betrothal letter.
 

Betrothal Gift Ceremony 过大礼 (Guo Da Li) for Teochew and Hokkien

In the past, Chinese, being a superstitious lot, believed the date and time you were born determine your character and future. Therefore it is very important for prospective couples’ eighth character 八字 to match before a wedding can take place. The Teochews are careful about avoiding a bad match.

During the search for a bride, the matchmakers introduce the eligible brides to the groom’s family with a profile card that contains details of the bride’s family background and eighth characters. The Teochew groom’s family would keep the profile card of the prospective bride for three days to see if anything bad happens. If none, both families would go consult a fortune teller to confirm if both parties are a good match. Of course nowadays such customs are rarely observed.

For Hokkiens and Teochews, the Betrothal Gift Ceremony proceeds the same way like other Chinese dialect group. Both families would meet up to select an auspicious wedding date, discuss about the wedding and to exchange gifts. The main distinction of the different dialect group is at the gift items. After the ceremony, the couple is considered to be betrothed to each other.

Gifts for the Groom to bring over
• *Teochew Only * Straw Basket ( To carry the gifts over)
• *Hokkien Only* Black and Red Basket ( To carry the gifts over)
• 1 Ang Bao with betrothal gift money 聘金 (Typically an amount with 8)
• 2 pair of Double Happiness candles (2 dragon 2 phoenix, full wax)
• 6 Pig trotters minimum (Available in cans. Gift for Mother-In-law)
• Hard liquor or red/white wine (Gift for Father-in-Law)
• Traditional wedding cakes (For bride’s family to distribute to relatives)
• 8-12 Oranges ( Symbolize good luck)
• 12-16 Apples ( Symbolize peace)
• *Teochew Only* Peanut Candy ( To have off springs soon)
• *Teochew Only* Sesame candy ( To have many off springs)
• *Hokkien Only* Rice candy ( For prosperity)
• *Teochew Only* Lao Ma Gor 老嫲糕 (A type of wedding pastry. Skip if the bride’s grandma is not around)
• *Teochew Only* Banana 连招贵子 ( Homophone for ‘bring’ To bring in children )
• A pair of Coconut 有爷有子 (Homophone for Grandfather and Child. To have a family with multi-generation)
• Charcoal ( To symbolize the bride will have a good life after marriage)
• Black Moss, Fa Cai 发菜 ( To strike rich)
• Jewelry (For the bride)
• 1 Gift Box 礼金盒 containing
– Jewelry ( For the Bride)
– *Teochew Only* 4 pieces of gold jewelry 四点金 (Ring, earrings, necklace and bangle. Will be given by groom’s parents during tea ceremony but need to be presented during Betrothal Gift Ceremony)
– Dried Longan (Bless with a dragon boy)
– Red date 鸿运当头 (To have good fortune)
– Lily bulbs 百年好合 (A harmonious union)

– Walnut/ Peanut 和和气气 ( To have harmony)
– Lotus seeds 连连生子 (To have many children)
– Dried tangerine 大吉大利 (To have great luck)
– Pine tree leaf 长寿 (If bride’s family has grandparents. Symbolized longevity and health, health and vitality for couple),
– Dried melon slice 甜甜蜜蜜 ( Sweet life together)
– Different grains like red beans, green beans, wheat, soy beans, barley and rice. (To bless the couple to have bountiful harvests)
• Double Happiness Stickers
• Red banner to hang over door
• 2 cans of tea leaves and 2 packets of white sesame seeds (To symbolize seeds growing into trees)

Gifts for the Bride’s family to return
• Gold Ring, or watch, or cufflinks, or belt, or wallet with an Ang Bao inserted (For the groom)
• 2 bottles of orange juice or syrup (For good luck)
• Portion of the gift received from groom (Usually half will be returned)
• Huat kueh 发糕 (Symbolize prosperity)
Dowry from Bride’s family ( Groom to bring the items back to the bridal chamber)
• Furniture such as bed, mattress or dressing table
• 1 Sewing machine/Sewing kit (To be bound together)

• 1 Ruler 得寸进尺 (To have many children and grandchildren)
• *Hokkien Only* Sugar Cane 同甘共苦 ( To go through thick and thin together)
• Essentials 子孙三宝 ( To symbolize fertility)
– Bath Basin
– Wash basin
– Spittoon
– Mug
– Towel
– Toothpaste
– Toothbrush
• Linen (Pillow covers and bed sheet)
• Tea set (For tea ceremony at groom’s side)
• Bowl set
• 2 pair of Chopstick 早生贵子 (To have off springs soon)
• 1 pair of Bedside Lamp 添丁发财 (To symbolize fertility and wealth)
• 1 Red umbrella (To be left in bride’s home for use on wedding day)
• Fate coins 大缘小缘 (For setting up matrimonial bed 安床. Place some at 4 corners of the bed, of the room and in cupboards and drawers)
• Jewelry (optional)

Above information courtesy of House of Etiquette

Other Wedding Traditions for Teochew & Hokkien
 
Setting up Matrimonial Bed 安床 (An Chuang)
 
Hair Combing Ritual 上头 (Shang Tou)
 
Fetching the Bride 接新娘 (Jie Xin Niang)
 
Leaving the Bride’s House 出阁 (Chu Ge)
 
Entering the groom’s house 过门 (Guo Men)
 
Returning to bride’s home 三朝回门 (San Chao Hui Men)
 

Chinese pre-wedding customs

src: singaporebrides.com

Chinese pre-wedding customs are traditional Chinese rituals prescribed by the ?? [láih gei] (Book of Rites), the ?? [yìh láih] (Book of Etiquette and Ceremonial) and the ??? [baahk fú tùng] (Bai Hu Tong) condensed into a series of rituals now known as the ???? [sàam syù luhk láih] (Three Letters and Six Rites). Traditionally speaking, a wedding that incorporates all 6 rites is considered a [daaih chéui] (complete wedding, dà q?).

The six traditional rites involved in a Chinese wedding are as follows:

  1. [naahp chói] (nacai)- formal proposal
  2. [muhn mìhng] (wenming) – giving of the eight characters of prospective bride to the groom’s side
  3. [naahp gàt] (naji) – placement of the eight characters at the ancestral altar to confirm compatibility
  4. [naahp jìng] (nazheng) – sending of betrothal gifts to the bride and return gifts to the prospective groom
  5. ?? [chíng kèih] (qingqi) – selection of an auspicious wedding date
  6. ?? [chàn yìhng] (qinying) – wedding ceremony

Video Chinese pre-wedding customs

Selection of dates

The first step is the selection of auspicious dates (???) for the Chinese wedding, the betrothal and the installation of the bridal bed. A Chinese monk or a temple fortune teller selects a suitable date based on the couple’s birth dates and times. Some may also refer to the Chinese calendar or almanac for good days. Even numbered months and dates are preferred, and the lunar seventh month is avoided as it is the month of the Hungry Ghost Festival.

After the selection of the auspicious dates, wedding details such as types and quantities of betrothal gifts, reciprocal gifts, bride price (??), and number of tables at the wedding banquet provided by the groom’s parents for the bride’s parents’ guests are settled.

Maps Chinese pre-wedding customs

Betrothal

Up to three months or earlier before the wedding day, the groom will deliver the betrothal gifts to the bride’s family on an auspicious date.?

The betrothal (Chinese: ???; pinyin: guo dàl?, also known as ?? or nàc?i) is an important part of the Chinese wedding tradition. During this exchange, the groom’s family presents the bride’s family with betrothal gifts (called ?? or pìnl?) to symbolize prosperity and good luck. Moreover, the bride’s family receives the bride price (Chinese: ??; pinyin: p?ng j?n; literally: “abundant gold”) in red envelopes. The bride’s family also returns (??, huíl?) a set of gifts to the groom’s side. Additionally, the bride’s parents bestow a dowry (??, jiàzhu?ng, kè-chng) to the bride.

The selection of betrothal gifts varies by the ancestral regions of the bride and groom. In cases of intermarriage between various Chinese dialect speakers, brides typically follow the groom’s ancestral traditions, not the other way around.

The gifts are often in even number for the meaning of in couple and in pairs. Food items given to the bride include wine, oranges, and tea; while jewelry for the bride includes gold earrings, necklaces, bracelets, and rings. In some regions, they are also combined with some local food, such as peanuts and dates (in Chinese, the word for “date” is a near homonym of “early”, while “peanut” is “birth”). This is normally presented on the wedding day, with the wishes of giving birth to a child early in the marriage. Candles and paper cut “Double Happiness” are often seen on a wedding day as well.

The bride price, which is given by the groom’s family to the bride’s family, varies from region to region. In Southern China, the bride price is much higher than in Northern China.

After the betrothal gifts and bride price are negotiated and given, the families select a special date for the wedding. The wedding date is announced via invitations about a month earlier, and the invitations are distributed to the friends and relatives about one or two weeks before the wedding day.

Cantonese traditions

During the wedding rituals, Cantonese brides invariably don a ?? [kwàhn kwáa], a highly embroidered red silk dress, which consists of a petticoat, adorned with the images of a ? [lùhng] (dragon) and a ? [fuhng] (phoenix), and a long skirt.

A hair combing ceremony (see description below) is performed.

In addition, the groom is expected to give a pair of matching ??? [lùhng fuhng ngáak] (dragon and phoenix bracelets), which are most commonly made of gold, to the bride, and are to be worn during the wedding festivities. The dragon and phoenix motif symbolize a blissful union, as described by the Chinese phrase ??? [lùhng fuhng pui] (a union of the dragon and phoenix).

On the third day following the wedding, the newlywed bride’s first return visit to her family home after marriage is called ?? [gwài nìhng]. A ?? [siu jyù] (whole roasted pig) is presented to the bride’s family, who customarily will keep the pig’s body and return the pig’s head and legs, along with other gifts. Traditionally, a perfect roast pig was offered as a sign of the bride’s virginity.

Hokkien traditions

In the Hokkien dialect, the betrothal rite is known as sang jit-thau (???, sàng-ji?t-thâu) or its abbreviated form sang jit.

Betrothal gifts unique to the Hokkien include pig trotters and rice candies. Household items are also given to the bride, symbolic of the duties she will assume as wife.

Among the most important return gifts for the Hokkien is a set of silver coins called yuánqián (??) or dà yuán (??) and xi?o yuán (??), given by the bride to the groom’s siblings.

A Hokkien tradition is for the bride’s family to offer a spittoon replete with red dates, dried longans and lotus seeds, along with other sweets, sealed with red paper, as part of the dowry.

On the day of the wedding, the bride’s mother is presented with an uncooked pork leg, to show gratitude for her caretaking.

The Hokkien traditionally incorporate sugarcane as a motif during wedding celebrations for protection; it is tied to the doorpost of the doorpost of the couple’s home and to the bridal carriage. This practice stems from a traditional legend in which Hokkiens were spared from a massacre by a Song dynasty emperor by hiding in sugarcane fields. Sugarcane also features a prominent role during the ninth day of Chinese New Year celebrations (marking the Jade Emperor’s birthday).

During the eve of the wedding ceremony, Hokkien families pay respects to the Jade Emperor, called in Thi?-kong Hokkien (??, lit. Lord of Heaven), to seek his protection. Six food dishes and five kinds of fruit are offered as well.

Teochew traditions

The foremost Teochew betrothal gift is the sì di?nj?n (???), four pieces of jewelry including a gold necklace, a pendant, a pair of earrings and a bangle selected by a groom’s mother and presented to the bride during the tea ceremony. Since sì di?nj?n is also the name of a traditional Chinese architectural style, a four-pointed curved roof found in traditional homes, the jewelry symbolizes a blissful union in a secure home.

The Teochew also give flaky pastries similar to hopia, as well as peanut candies. If the bride’s grandmother is still alive, pastries called laoma gao (???) are offered to her.

src: cdn4.i-scmp.com

Delivery of the bride’s dowry

The bride’s parents may include the ?? [gaa jòng] (bride’s dowry) (jiàzhu?ng) along with the reciprocal gifts on the day of betrothal, or may present the bride’s dowry separately a few days before the wedding ceremony. Chinese dowries typically include:

  • bedding (e.g. pillows, bolsters, comforter set, blankets, bed sheets)
  • new clothing for the bride, delivered in a suitcase (in the past, wardrobes or wooden wedding chests were used)
  • tea set for the wedding tea ceremony
  • a tub filled with baby items (???, which may include a baby bathtub, baby potty, washbasin, tumblers, toothpaste and toothbrush, mirror, comb, etc.)
  • two pairs of red wooden clogs, wedding slippers or bedroom slippers
  • a sewing basket (with even numbered rolls of colourful thread, needles, pincushion, scissors, and sewing wax with auspicious words on it)
  • gold jewellery given by bride’s parents

src: cdn1.i-scmp.com

Installation of the bridal bed

Another ritual is the installation of the bridal bed (??, ?n chuáng). At an auspicious date and time, a woman of good fortune installs the bridal bed in the bridal room. New red or pink bedsheets are used and a plate of dried longans, lotus seeds, red dates, persimmons, sprig of pomegranate leaves together with 2 red packets are placed on the bed. A pair of bedside lamps (???) is lit to symbolize the addition of sons to the family.

src: www.fsans.org

Hair combing ceremony

A hair combing ceremony (?? [sò tàuh]) is also conducted on the eve of the wedding. After showering with water infused with pomelo or pomegranate leaves, the bride and groom change into a new set of clothing and shoes. Attending female family members bless them aloud as they sit in front of an open window with the visible moon or in front of the mirror.

The four blessings are:

  • ???????[yàt sò sò dou méih] (with the first combing, be blessed to be together to the end,)
  • ????????[yih sò baak nìhn hóu hahp] (with the second combing, be blessed with a hundred years of harmony in marriage,)
  • ????????[sàam sò jí syùn múhn tòhng] (with the third combing, be blessed with a houseful of children and grandchildren)
  • ????????[sei sò baahk faat chàih mèih] (with the fourth combing, be blessed with longevity)

A sweet dessert soup containing pink glutinous-rice spherical dumplings called ?? tòng yùhn is served after the hair combing ceremony to wish the couple a complete and sweet marriage.

src: www.cyprus-photo.com

Chinese wedding decorations ????

?? [sèung héi] (double happiness) decorations will be placed on all wedding items such as the betrothal gifts, dowry, the couple’s toiletries and cosmetics. The bridal room furniture, especially the mirror and cupboards, will also be decorated with double joy or other wedding paper cutouts such as pairs of mandarin ducks, dragon and phoenix, etc. Similar red wedding paper cutouts will also be put up on the main door, bridal room door and generally around the house.

A red banner (???) will be hung across the front doors of the two household to announce the joyous event.

Even overseas Chinese, such as in Singapore, who marry will also apply the same ?? [sèung héi] (double happiness) decorations and customs as in China. Chinese couples in multi-racial countries like Singapore may also retain their own Cantonese, Teochew, Hokkien, and other traditions depending on their origin and Chinese language spoken.

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See also

  • Chinese wedding reception
  • Chinese marriage

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References

Source of article : Wikipedia

Excessive betrothal gifts need to be reined in

Illustration: Peter C. Espina/GT

The problem with caili besieging rural families in China should be construed not only socially but also in economic terms for possible solutions to be worked out.

Caili, or betrothal gifts, date back to the Western Zhou Dynasty (1046-771BC) as an indication of a marital bond. If the family of a bride accepted the gift from the bridegroom’s family, it  indicated an engagement to be married. The centuries-old tradition was initially put in place to maintain social order but gradually became legally binding.

There were already detailed rules for betrothal gifts in the Tang Dynasty (618-907), which considered a bride price as a prerequisite for marriage and that once it was accepted, however small the amount, it was civilly and criminally binding. Until the Republic of China (1912-49), the law stipulated that an engagement or marriage would be legally acknowledged only after a certificate for marriage was signed or caili was accepted.

Betrothal gifts and bride prices were denounced as a type of marriage transaction, per marriage rules unveiled in 1941 by the Jin-Cha-Ji Border Region Administrative Committee. Marriage rules and regulations released after the founding of the People’s Republic of China in 1949 also prohibited betrothal gifts before caili reappeared in the country’s legal framework in the form of judicial interpretation in 2003. The tradition has not died but has become increasingly monetized.

It needs to be pointed out that the long-lasting practice makes sense in economic terms. For the bride’s family, the marriage generally means the loss of a labor force which is financially offset by the bride price. In the case of the groom, caili is a wealth indicator that measures his family’s social status.

With caili also considered as an economic activity engaged in by the families of both the bride and the groom, it requires understanding from an economic point of view. Economic activities can’t be fully reasonable and while it’s necessary that economic activities fall under the purview of laws and regulations, it shouldn’t be expected that all activities are legally regulated.

Along with the economy’s fast growth, the caili issue has grown rapidly. A survey by China’s State broadcaster showed in 2016 that caili given by the average rural family topped 100,000 yuan ($14,502), decidedly a large fortune for rural households.

Multiple factors have led to this problem, mostly seen in China’s rural areas. First, the country’s reform and opening-up has turned surplus rural labor into surplus value and has widened the gap between the rich and poor. Wealthy rural families took the lead in raising the amount of caili, which has inevitably driven others to follow. Second, changes in rural livelihoods have made moral rules and principles less binding. Moral rules used to keep a tight rein on rural communities when agriculture was relied on as a means of living, however, increasing labor mobility is breaking this down. Third, there are over 30 million more men than women of marriageable age in the country, which lays the groundwork for the bride’s family to ask for a higher price. Fourth, the persistence of social stratification has put pressure on poor rural families who are prone to regard caili as a fate changer. Some well-off families also hope to rule out the possibility of marrying a man from a poor family by demanding sky-high caili. Fifth, a heavy reliance of young people in rural areas on their parents to afford caili to payouts for life after marriage makes the issue more severe.

That said, the issue of caili is intimately correlated to the rapid rise of the economy and the vicissitudes of the society. It needs to be addressed in terms of sociology, ethics, economics and jurisprudence. 

Some of the factors contributing to the problem derive from a natural drive to compare oneself to others. This should be guided toward less competition by publicly toning down caili and enacting tougher regulations against caili-related disputes instead of stern rebukes or arbitrary bans.

Factors such as the gender imbalance and the overreliance on parents require greater government efforts. It is likely that some abnormalities could result in even worse outcomes. Imbalanced economic growth, wider rich-poor gap and persistence of social stratification could trigger unease among people and possibly cause aspects of society to wobble further. This would perhaps be a test for the country’s governance capacity in a new era, which necessitates efforts to facilitate social mobility.

Only once the causes behind the betrothal gifts are identified can the deep-seated issue be addressed.

The author is chief economist with the International Cooperation Center of the National Development and Reform Commission. [email protected]

90,000 CHINESE WEDDING TRADITIONS – Jozhkin cat – LJ

For the past few weeks, every weekend we’ve been hearing firecrackers in our neighborhood. This means the bridegroom has arrived for the bride. Then we hear a chorus of men shouting something, and then after a while again firecrackers. So the groom took the bride and they left on. I will decipher these and other Chinese wedding traditions for you.

Wedding traditions in China of course change and become easier. For example, astrology used to play a big role. The groom sent his name to the bride’s parents, the exact date of birth, and they checked with the astrologer whether it was suitable for their daughter.Then the bride gave her “coordinates” to the groom’s parents and they – if everything was in order from an astrological point of view – gave their permission to marry. But this was at a time when marriage was more of a business, and love-sympathy was not even mentioned.

Now bridegrooms are free to choose whoever they want to be their spouses. If everything is decided and the matter is moving towards the wedding, then this is what is done.

Photo session
Some time before the wedding (sometimes 2-3 months) a professional photo session with a photographer is arranged somewhere in a cool place: in Hainan, or in London.I’m not kidding – they really do! My friend, a Chinese woman, flew with her fiance to Hainan (8 hours away from us with a transfer) for 10 days, did a pre-wedding photo session. Usually it can drag on for several days, well, so that the weather is good in the frame and different outfits and different backgrounds. Those who are richer will fly to London for such a photo shoot. Well, in their city, their province, they also do photo shoots, if there is no way to go somewhere, if, for example, the bride and groom are working and cannot take a vacation. T.That is, you get the idea – a pre-wedding photo session in wedding dresses is done before the wedding.

A photo album and several large photographs are being made. One will be hung in the bedroom of the newlyweds, and the other – in the hall of the banquet hall, she will “meet” the guests and direct them to the desired room. It is quite clear that it is not considered a bad omen here to see a bride in a wedding dress before the wedding. For a photo shoot, they can be rented from a photo studio, or they can be bought, after all, this is China and here wedding dresses cost from 30 to…. dollars … There may also be a series of photos in traditional Chinese costumes.

Invitations
Also, a couple of months before the wedding, a list of guests is drawn up and invitations are prepared. It is customary here not only to give an invitation, but also to give some kind of gift. Since the Chinese are practical people, gifts are usually edible. For example, we were given a mixture of seeds, nuts, candies (this is a fairly common gift), the last time the gift was a package of moon cakes and a pack of semi-dried apricots.

The invitations are also not the same as in the same Europe. Usually it is a red envelope with an insert on which the names of the newlyweds, the time and place of the wedding ceremony are indicated. I have never seen an invitation card with photographs of the newlyweds (only at our wedding we did this, and ordered them on the Internet, which suggests that, in principle, we are not an isolated case and if there is a proposal, then apparently there is a demand …) …

Invitations are given to people 2-3 weeks before the wedding. Usually you do not need to confirm your presence at the wedding.Because it’s usually on weekends and usually it’s only a couple of hours, so almost everyone gets through.

About red – it is generally very much loved in China, it symbolizes happiness. Therefore, there should be a lot of it at the wedding)) So the envelope from the invitation can be used for a monetary gift to the newlyweds. They don’t give material gifts, they donate money. I remember that at weddings in Ukraine, the bride and groom made a list of gifts in advance and there was a responsible person who sent this list of gifts to all those invited and people “booked” a gift that they could give (well, this is not to give 10 tea sets, but what the newlyweds really need).

In China, everything is simpler – everyone just gives money. In the same envelope in which you received your wedding invitation (most often). The amount of the gift depends on the donor’s generosity. In our city, for example, it is at least 200-300 yuan (35-50 dollars) per person or family. There are usually 10 people at the table, and the menu for one table costs about 1000 yuan (again, the prices of our not the cheapest city). Even if there are 5 families at the table and they “chipped in” each in envelopes of 200, then everything has already paid off.Relatives usually give more, but even between relatives there can be a mutual settlement relationship “how much you gave our daughter for the wedding, so much we gave to your son” …

REGISTRY OFFICE
Quite right, they go to the registry office a few months before the wedding. In the registry office there are no solemn ceremonies, they just filled out the forms, the employee looked through them, immediately asked you to get up, read the completed forms aloud by you, and that’s it. They also make a joint photo on a red (naturally!) Background for a marriage certificate.And that’s all. You can come in any clothes, even in a tracksuit …

After the registry office, some begin to live together, save money, and then a few months later they have a wedding ceremony. We have friends who, 3 years after the registry office, made a wedding ceremony. But in general, this is rather an exception, usually, after all, a few months in total.

What happens on your wedding day.
The bride and her bridesmaids gather in the bride’s house in the morning. And the groom and his friends are at his house.Well, the groom doesn’t need a lot of time, but the bride is getting ready – hair, makeup, dress. Most often, a white “European” wedding dress is worn at the beginning. And now the bride is ready and they sit and wait for the groom. At the same time, there are people who are waiting for the groom on the street near the entrance. Their task is to light those firecrackers when the groom arrives. Firecrackers drive away evil spirits if that … And then these same people must torment the groom a little before letting him into the entrance. Well, how are they tortured? – forced to drink a glass of vodka… Most often it is done by the groom’s friends. At the same time, they can all together shout the name of the bride calling her to the window. Well, this is optional, sometimes apartments overlook the opposite side from the entrance, then shout – do not shout …

So, the groom and his friends drank a stack of drinks, shouted, presented the guards of the gate with red envelopes (the groom needs to prepare a lot of such envelopes, there there is also money inside, but such small sums, 10-20 yuan (2-3 dollars), go up to the apartment. …

The next obstacle is the bride’s room, where she locked herself with her bridesmaids. And girlfriends also require red envelopes. Each one. When the envelopes are handed out, the groom can finally enter the bride’s room.

But not everything is simple here either. The bride sits on the bed and even if the groom does come, she can still refuse. And to do it is simple – do not accept the bouquet brought by the groom. Those. the groom brings a wedding bouquet with him, enters her room, kneels in front of the bride and hands her a bouquet.And if she accepts it, then she agrees, does not accept, then … well, you get the idea.

And so the groom hands out a bouquet to our bride, and the bridesmaids do not calm down and can ask the groom questions to see if he knows the bride well enough so that they give her to him. They can ask about weight, and about height, and about your favorite dishes. What comes to mind. When I was a bridesmaid, I was asked to ask the groom something in English so that he would answer in English.

The bride can stop this action at any time simply by taking the bouquet from the hands of the groom.Well, she took this bouquet and you sighed calmly, but no … The bride lost her shoe. How can she go anywhere without a shoe? The groom and his friends are looking for a shoe all over the room. If they find it, they will be able to take the bride away …

They found the shoe, the groom puts it on the bride’s leg ( straight Cinderella turns out to be …) And you think that’s all? No. Now we need to go into the living room and pay tribute to the bride’s parents.

“Tea Gift”
The bride and groom go into the living room and the groom seats the bride’s parents on the sofa, kneels down in front of them and brings them a cup of tea.This is such a ritual of respect for the bride’s parents. And of course, gifts are given to the bride’s parents, most often money, but there may be precious jewelry as well.

In response, parents treat their newfound “son” to dumplings, for example. They feed him straight like a small child. And they can also give a gift.

After that, everyone goes to the groom’s parents. (and here we again hear firecrackers when the cortege leaves the bride’s house. I must also say that usually the cars for the wedding are white or red, black ones are not taken – this is a “bad” color).Cars are also decorated with flowers, ribbons and hieroglyphs “happiness”.

In the groom’s house
They again greet the cortege with firecrackers. This time, the bride must pay tribute to the groom’s parents – bring them a cup of tea and gifts. And all this, too, on my knees. And in return, they also feed her something and give her gifts. Gifts to the groom’s parents are often symbolic and practical, for example, several blocks of cigarettes on a tray under a red (of course!) Napkin (this is more a practical gift than a symbolic one), a fish is a symbol of happiness, abundance (you get the idea), even a piece of meat can give it that way.And of course, most of the gift is just money. Parents in return also present with a thick red envelope))

Wedding ceremony
Usually held in a restaurant. At the entrance you will be greeted by a huge (almost as tall) photograph of the newlyweds. There will also be a table at the entrance where you can check in and give your red envelope with a cash gift. Often this envelope will be immediately opened and recorded how much you donated. And if then you invite this couple to a similar celebration, then you will be given the same amount “in return”.

“Wedding” on the rise
All, absolutely all weddings in which we participated, began in the second half of the hour, after the hands had passed the mark of 30 minutes. Either at 12.30, or at 13.30. Why? This is because the arrows begin to rise and are a symbol of the creation of a new family on the rise. If young people get married during the first half of an hour, they begin their life together in a downturn. Therefore, if the invitation says 13.30, then it is better to come by that time.Because most likely the ceremony will start on time or with a very slight delay.

Since China is like a communist country, the wedding ceremony is carried out by some employee of the wedding agency, who will then also conduct an entertainment program for the guests. The ceremony itself lasts no more than half an hour. The young took the stage, said wedding vows, exchanged rings, kissed and that’s it. All this is a little diluted, decorated with beautiful phrases of the host about the family, the values ​​of marriage, the beauty of the bride and the masculinity of the groom.Also, the parents of the groom-bride can be invited to the stage, who will say their wishes to the children. After that, the newlyweds leave the stage and just the program continues there.

The bride and groom most often go on stage together, at the same time. Sometimes the groom will come out first, and then the father will bring the bride, a bit like the Western style. All this can be negotiated with the presenter and choose the method that the bride and groom wants.

HANDLES AND FRIENDS do not go on stage with the bride and groom.If the bride needs help, well, there is a dress to fix or give a bouquet of flowers to hold it, then most likely it will be done by the host’s assistant, also in a beautiful dress. Only once, at a wedding we attended, there were friends and friends who somehow participated in the program – they danced before the bride went out and then also together with the bride and groom. And then they brought out the cake. In this case, of course, they will be suitably dressed, most likely in the same dresses presented by the bride. But usually there are no friends.

The program includes a couple of guest competitions. They will certainly throw soft toys to guests and children. Some of the guests will sing a song, and maybe more than one. Dance from guest artists. And the presenter will “polish” it all with his song performance.

Guests eat at the same time. Usually there is a lot of food, just a lot. Dishes 12-15 for 10 people, and when you are already full, the dishes are still brought. And each dish is designed for 5-6 people, so estimate for yourself how much food there is left and that’s why we always carry bags from weddings. .. Here, by the way, it should be noted that there will be one more gift for each guest on the table – a small box with sweets. And these are special wedding candies – they are in red packaging and with all the same hieroglyphs “happiness” or “double happiness” (although here they are common in the tyrnet photo) …

But these are more often than not. Candies inside are caramel or jelly. The Chinese do not make wedding chocolates, but since the bride and groom themselves control what these boxes are filled with, they can buy whatever chocolates they want.

Tribute to the guests
And what do the newlyweds do while the guests are eating?
First, the bride will change into a traditional Chinese red qipao dress.
Secondly, the young will have to go to each table with glasses of wine, thank the guests for coming to the wedding and drink wine or vodka with them. There is no photo session with guests familiar to Europeans. No, of course, at the end of the program, go to the newlyweds and take a photo with them, but you will have to wait until they are photographed on stage with relatives – this is the only organized photo for which the host will invite people.And everything else is at personal request.

By the way, guests come to the wedding in a lot of ways. I did not notice that the Chinese people were somehow tense and tried to dress festively for the wedding. Some may be, but in general there is no such culture. And they will come in sweatpants without steaming a single drop.

The whole celebration is short-lived – 2 to maximum 3 hours. And when the host announces the end of the program, everyone suddenly gets up and leaves. No, well, I’m kidding, of course, but in principle it is, everything means everything and you can leave.

And here’s another.
The bed for newlyweds one day before the wedding is set by a person of luck, that is, a person who has many children. What does install mean? Well, if a new one bought a new one, for example, or decorates. The correct symbols are laid out on the bed. For example, bran means there will be a rich son, peanuts and chestnuts – soon there will be a baby, pomegranate – fertility, lotus seeds and many other fruits. Children are also allowed to play on the bed. This is all as a wish of the heirs in the very near future))) And necessarily red bed linen.Here, in every bedding store, there is necessarily a set of wedding bedding, and there may even be a person who will bring everything and lay it down, hang it up, lay it out.

These are the Chinese wedding traditions and customs that I observed myself. Of course, I will not say that this is universal for the whole of China and that this is a complete list. For example, once I was at a wedding in the village, and there at some point the bride and groom were seated in a conspicuous place and the guests-relatives presented them as gifts with pieces of fabric, red silk, which they tied the bride and groom over their shoulders.I have not seen this at city weddings. Then they did the same in relation to the father-mother of the groom-bride, they also tied them with pieces of red silk.

If you are not tired of reading
about a wedding in the village here
about a wedding where Liang and I were a friend here
about our wedding here

Chinese wedding. Folk traditions of China

Chinese wedding

In ancient China, marriage took a very long time, as it was accompanied by a very complex set of rituals.

Traditional Chinese weddings are currently undergoing significant changes. But, however, the ceremonies and rituals around the marriage proposal, engagement, gifts to the bride’s parents, the wedding ceremony – everything is deeply symbolic.

As a rule, in China, the attitude to the wedding was and is very serious.

First of all, the Chinese check the compatibility of the young according to the horoscope. So many girls are now looking for husbands. If the horoscope readings are suitable for the family, then from the groom’s family to the bride’s family are sent with gifts.This is followed by the exchange of marriage guarantees and, finally, the conclusion of the marriage contract. And in ancient China, marriage contracts were quite common. The wedding is appointed at the end of the year, and in order to determine the date more precisely, they again turn to the horoscope. And there is always the answer. Moreover, they choose not only a specific day, but also a specific time – it is desirable that the wedding begins in the second half of the hour, when the clock hands are pointing up, that is, in the direction of prosperity, wealth and good luck.

On the eve of the wedding, feasts are organized in the houses of the bride and groom, in which invited relatives and friends take part.

On the wedding day, the bride dresses up in the morning for the ceremony of moving to the house of her future husband. She says goodbye to her parents and other relatives.

According to Chinese tradition, the bride should have three dresses: a white dress with a veil is worn during the wedding ceremony, the second is a traditional Chinese wedding dress for a banquet, and the last is a dress of the departing bride to be worn before leaving the banquet.

Nowadays one of the most important traditions has been preserved in Chinese weddings – the use of red.

Even if today the Chinese bride decides to flaunt in a European white dress, she will still wear red shoes on her feet and take a red umbrella in her hands. In addition, the hall for the celebration will be decorated in red. The cortege is also decorated with red flowers. For the Chinese, red is a symbol of love, prosperity and happiness. Wedding accessories such as invitations, gifts, envelopes and even the bride’s wedding dress are decorated in a red palette.

Photos for a wedding album are not taken on the wedding day, but in advance, sometimes even a month or two. On the day of the celebration, guests can already see the finished album of the bride and groom.

The wedding procession from the groom’s house goes to the bride’s house to pick her up. But the bride is not given away so easily.

Girlfriends and relatives of the bride can only give it away for a certain fee. And the groom has to ransom the bride by giving them red envelopes (hong bao) with money.

On the wedding day, a tea ceremony takes place, at which the bride officially introduces herself to the family of her future husband.

Banquet plays an important role in Chinese weddings. The festive menu, usually 12 courses, includes delicacies such as roast suckling pig and shark fin soup, fish, chicken in red oil, lotus seed crisps, pigeons and lobsters. This food brings prosperity, harmony and success.

In a Chinese family, parents are treated with great respect. At the wedding, they are the most important persons. Usually, parents sit at a separate table, and the bride and groom address them several times with words of gratitude.

By the way, in a restaurant in China they do not walk long – after the wedding, it is not customary to stay up late.

The couple’s parents usually give a new bed with a set of bedding. Before the wedding, the young nephew should jump on the bed for good luck to the newlyweds in the birth of offspring.

Relatives and friends donate envelopes with money. How much – everyone decides for himself, but the main thing is to have the number 8 – a favorable sign.

The Chinese are great originals of wedding scenarios.

Wedding celebrations can take place in a shop, outdoors, on the river, or on a bus. Such spectacular events are remembered for a lifetime.

China has established the “Marriage Law”, according to which men who have reached the age of 22 and women who are at least 20 years old have the right to marry and obtain a marriage certificate from the appropriate competent authority. This is how their legal matrimonial relationship is established.

This text is an introductory fragment.

Continuation for liters

How much does a wedding gift cost in different countries of the world – Rossiyskaya Gazeta

As you know, summer is the most popular “wedding” season. “RG” decided to find out how and with what scale the wedding ceremony takes place in different countries.

All gifts in the safe

In Israel, a wedding – “khatuna” – is held, as a rule, in a special celebration hall, in fact, in a restaurant, but with a large “hatseret”, that is, a “courtyard”, sometimes comparable in territory to a small park or garden.There is usually a “khasefet”, a kind of “safe” in the form of a beautifully designed box with a mail slot. It is there that guests put envelopes with money or a check written out for the newlyweds. Donors can take the envelopes themselves at the entrance, inscribe their names, wishes and put them in this box. Of course, no one “khasefet”, let alone the envelopes at the wedding itself, opens. Also, no one excludes the arrival of random people who leave neither gifts nor money.

The sums that the invitees leave in envelopes are different.Much depends on family closeness. But the minimums are still determined. The average restaurant “mana”, that is, the fee, is determined at a minimum of 250 shekels (just over $ 80). From this “base” amount, the invitee to the wedding, in a certain sense, “dances”. Wedding organizers, newlyweds, their parents and closest relatives pay not only for “food”, but also for the orchestra, the services of a host, a visiting cult worker, a photographer and a cameraman for memory filming. Therefore, even distant relatives or simply acquaintances who have come by invitation, at least add one hundred shekels to the cost of “mana”.On average, an invitee to a wedding party leaves 500 shekels in an envelope. If a married couple or a family is invited, then those who have accepted the invitation will spend a pretty penny for those who have accepted the invitation. After all, in the end, the envelopes will certainly be opened, and no one wants to be branded as greedy. But no one canceled the usual gifts. The average cost of a wedding in Israel is over one hundred thousand shekels. More than half of this amount costs only the rent of the hall. According to the Israel Central Bureau of Statistics, the annual turnover of the wedding services industry (including other celebrations such as marriage anniversaries) is about six billion shekels.

Practicality above all

In Germany, weddings are increasingly turning into noisy parties on a grand scale. Photo: Depositphotos

In Germany, weddings are increasingly turning into noisy feasts, giving way to a modest celebration with the family. If the newlyweds want to vividly celebrate the wedding, usually on the day of visiting the registry office a large restaurant or any other place is rented (depending on the size of the wallet, it can be an old castle or a yacht club), relatives and friends are invited, as well as work colleagues.Gifts are generally negotiated in advance. If the newlyweds have not previously lived with each other, they can ask guests to buy various household items. This is done primarily to avoid duplicate gifts and make it easier for guests to find them. Only close relatives have the right to give money. Sometimes the parents of the bride and groom throw off their honeymoon during the “courtship weeks” – an analogue of the Russian “honeymoon”. There are no restrictions for flowers and other little things.

Newlyweds in flowers

In Bulgaria, weddings combine old traditions and modern trends.Much attention is paid to the details of the organization of the celebration. Bulgarians rarely hire wedding agents. Basically, the newlyweds themselves are engaged in wedding chores: they make lists of invited close friends and relatives, then send personalized envelopes to the addresses.

The wedding event is held depending on the family’s budget. However, this does not matter for a bright and cheerful holiday. At a Bulgarian wedding, many flowers are usually presented, with a special respect for bouquets of lavender and roses. At a certain moment, the bride and groom with an elegant basket walk around the hall to receive gifts.Especially appreciated are the original hand-made gizmos, which will then remind you of the solemn event. Practical items such as sets and cutlery sets are often gifted. Following modern trends, many guests pass envelopes with greeting cards and money to the young. For an average wedding, it can be 100 or 200 levs (1 lev equals approximately 35 rubles). Parents give three to four thousand leva to children who enter into a life together.

Present with coins

In Turkey, relatives agree on the organization of the wedding of the newlyweds at the stage of the matchmaking ceremony.Families are discussing how, where, and most importantly, at whose expense to hold the celebration. In addition, it is discussed who to invite, where the young family will live, what gifts they should give. Before the wedding, it is customary to widely celebrate the engagement. As a rule, not every engagement ends with a wedding. Several months, or even several years, may elapse between these events.

Israel’s wedding services industry has a turnover of 6 billion shekels

Wealthy Turks turn the engagement ceremony into a “rehearsal” for the wedding.They organize a buffet reception in some fashionable hotel in the city or on the Mediterranean coast. The engagement ceremony itself looks like an official public statement of the future married couple about the decision to get married. The bride and groom exchange rings. At the same time, those present pay attention to what precious stone the girl’s ring is decorated with. The more expensive it is, the clearer the indicator of the groom’s material status. Parents and relatives congratulate the engaged couple, and then guests. Often, the engagement is organized and paid for by the bride’s relatives, while the costs of the wedding are borne by the groom’s side.

The scenario of the wedding itself may differ depending on the region, the material well-being of the young people and their relatives. The room where the ceremony will take place is decorated with gift flower wreaths. The names of the people and the names of the companies that sent them are indicated on the ribbons. Wealthy Turks rent an entire restaurant or hotel for a wedding. The presenting ceremony takes place at the end of the holiday: the couple personally accepts congratulations and gifts from each guest. The invitees give them money or gold coins.

In the Chinese hinterland, they keep records of offerings from guests at a wedding feast. Photo: Reuters

90,000 Chinese wedding tea ceremony

Tea in China plays a significant role not only in the daily life of a person. This is an integral part of such family celebrations. as engagements and weddings, as it symbolizes the desire of people for true love and a happy marriage. Before the wedding, the groom’s family gives the bride’s family gifts (dowry), where tea is an important element of this dowry.If the bride’s family receives a dowry, they consent to the marriage. The bride’s family then presents the groom with a set of gifts.

It is difficult to tell the exact time when tea became an integral part of the Chinese dowry. The earliest written records of wedding tea ceremonies date back to the Tang Dynasty (618-907). When the Tang princess Wencheng married the Tibetan emperor Songtsan Gampo in 641 AD, tea was already on her dowry list. Since the Song Dynasty (960-1279 BC)AD) tea drinking was an obligatory part of the wedding process. Even for low-income families, tea was an essential ingredient in engagement gifts. In addition, since tea drinking was already widespread during the Song Dynasty, tea was also used to entertain guests on their wedding day.

Tea continued to play a role in the institution of marriage during the Yuan (1271–1368), Ming (1368–1644), and Qing (1644–1912) times. dynasties.
Since the early 1990s, weddings have begun to modernize and now partially copy Western customs.However, the tradition of tea ceremonies at Chinese weddings has survived and is highly regarded to this day.

The wedding tea ceremony is one of the most significant events in a Chinese wedding. It is called jing cha in Chinese, which literally means “respectfully offering tea” and includes a very formal introduction to the bride and groom and expresses respect for their families.

In the distant past, a young couple had to kneel, serving tea as a sign of respect.Nowadays, most modern families require a couple to bow down. Typically, a couple must first serve their parents, then grandparents, and then other relatives. However, sometimes the grandparents are served first and then the parents. In addition, the bride served tea to all close relatives from the groom’s side; but today this custom is rarely followed, and only in more traditional families.

Initially, tea ceremonies for the bride’s relatives were held in the afternoon.Before marriage, the bride served tea to her family in private. The tea ceremony for the groom was usually held in the morning and was supposed to take place after the couple was married.

Today, many couples choose to show respect for the families of the bride and groom by holding the wedding tea ceremony for both parties at the same time, instead of having two separate ceremonies as before. Nowadays, most families organize a general wedding banquet in a hotel or restaurant.The bride and groom are expected to serve tea to both pairs of parents. This is considered an important moment of the marriage, only after that the members of the two families become relatives. After the couple serves tea to both parents, the parents respond by presenting the new couple with red envelopes of money, and sometimes even gold jewelry. At the same time, many parents give advice and blessings to the couple, thus expressing their love and approval.

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90,000 In China, the groom’s mother committed suicide because of the too expensive “ransom” of the bride

Photo illustrative: store.happytifywin.com

A Chinese woman from Ningling County (Henan Province) took her own life after her son’s engagement. The bride’s parents requested an overpriced wedding gift, Shanghaiist reported.

As a “ransom” for the bride, the parents insisted on buying a car. The groom’s family could not afford such a gift, which is why the young man’s mother fell into a deep depression.The woman committed suicide by throwing herself into the river.

Screenshot: Shanghaiist

After the body of the Chinese woman was dragged ashore, the husband of the drowned in despair also attempted suicide.

In a heated discussion on Chinese social networks, Internet users considered buying a car for the newlyweds a relevant wedding gift and blamed the groom for the incident.

“Why are the groom’s parents obliged to be responsible for such gifts? This is the responsibility of the son.And why marry, if you have not materially taken place at all? ” – one of the commentators shared his opinion.

Also, the suicide of the mother was associated with the problem of gender inequality in the country. According to the latest data, 113.5 boys are born for every 100 girls in China. In some areas, the gender imbalance reaches 100: 135, and the total number of men is 33 million more than the number of women.

It becomes difficult for Chinese bachelors to find a bride, and it becomes even more difficult to pay for a wedding.In some parts of the country, families are asking for amounts ranging from 120,000 to 200,000 yuan ($ 30,000) as a ransom for girls. Read more about the traditions and rituals of Chinese weddings in the EKD material.

Upd : According to the latest data, the groom’s mother committed suicide because she did not like a potential daughter-in-law. The woman was categorically not satisfied with the girl’s height: she was too short. The same source adds that the son participated in saving his father from the river.

90,000% d0% bf% d0% be% d0% bc% d0% be% d0% bb% d0% b2% d0% ba% d0% b0 in Chinese | Glosbe

Assuming that such investors find FE holders willing to purchase their BE , then a significant BE to FE rate looms, which depends on the size of the transaction, the relative impatience of the holders of BE and the expected duration of capital controls.

假设 此 人 找到 了 一个 自由 欧 持有 人 愿意 出手 兑换, 则会 根据 交易 的 额度, 银行 欧 持有者 的 急迫 程度, 以及 资本 管制 的 预期 持续 时间 而 出现 一个 银行 欧 / 自由 欧 汇率。

ProjectSyndicate

Microcomponents (Sb, As, Ba , Be , Bi, Ca, F, Ga, Au, Mg, Pd, Ru, Sr, S, Y, Zr)

微量 成分 (锑 、 砷 、 钡 、 铍 、 铋 、 钙 、 氟 、 镓 、 金 、 镁 、 钯 、 钌 、 锶 、 硫 、 钇 、 锆)

UN-2

additional information is required on points 5 [ B2 ] and 6 [ B2 ]

要求 就 第 5 段 [B2] 和 第 6 段 [B2] 提供 的 补充 资料

UN-2

No proposals were submitted for subparagraphs 96 (a), 96 (s) and 96 ( bb ) and no action was taken by the Committee.

未 在 分 项 96 (a), 96 (s) 和 96 (bb) 下 提出 任何 提案, 委员会 也 未 采取 任何 行动。

UN-2

bb ) United Nations conference to identify ways to eliminate nuclear threat in the context of nuclear disarmament (decision

bb) 确定 如何 在 核 裁军 范畴 内 消除 核 危险 的 联合国 会议 (第 # 号 决定)。

MultiUn

bb ) update the Integrated Management Information System (IMIS) leave data to reflect accurate information and introduce appropriate leave registration controls (paragraph

bb) 更新 综合 管理 信息 系统 (综 管 系统) 休假 记录 以 反映 正确 信息, 并对 休假 记录 采取 适当 的 控制 措施 (第 # 段

MultiUn

Another suggestion was to use the wording “is presumed to be ” in the English text

另一个 建议 是, 应将 这些 词 改为 “被 推定 为…… 的 时间 ”。

MultiUn

bb ) Develop / strengthen programs to assist commercial banks in developing countries to train bank managers and staff on how to better assess the credit risks of SMEs, especially in the case of women entrepreneurs

ii) 通过 共同 筹资 和 技术 援助 参与 创建 当地 和 区域 的 各种 电子 金融 平台, 以 改进 对 中小企业 和 其他 的 服务 质量

MultiUn

Powder extinguishers, which show a yellow star with a D, are only used for Class D fires where metals are burning, while dry powder extinguishers can be used for Class ABC or BC fires.

干粉 灭火器 印 上 了 有 D 字 的 黄 星, 用来 扑灭 金属 类 火警; 干 化学 剂 灭火器 则 用来 扑灭 ABC 或 BC 类 火警。

jw2019

States Parties to the Convention on the Prohibition of the Use, Stockpiling, Production and Transfer of Anti-personnel Mines and on Their Destruction, Twelfth Session [Art. 11, para. 2] bc

关于 禁止 使用 、 储存 、 生产 和 转让 杀伤 人员 地雷 及 销毁 此种 地雷 的 公约 缔约国, 第十二届 会议 [公约 第 11 条 第 2 款] b, c

UN-2

[ B2 ]: With regard to the effective protection of human rights defenders, additional information should be requested on: (a) Investigations, prosecutions and regulations on the effective protection of human rights defenders and the provision of remedies to them; (b) Measures taken to improve the protection of human rights defenders; and (c) measures taken to encourage human rights defenders to file complaints with the national defense mechanism.

[B2]: 关于 有效 保护 人权 捍卫 者 问题, 应 要求 提供 补充 资料, 说明: (a) 是否 对 加害者 进行 了 调查 、 起诉, 以及 是否 颁布 了 规定, 为 人权 捍卫 者 提供 有效 的 保护 和 补救; (b) 采取 了 哪些 措施 加强 保护 人权 捍卫 者 的 措施; 和 (c) 采取 了 哪些 措施 鼓励 人权 捍卫 者 向 国家 保护 机制 提出 申索。

UN-2

a) Continue efforts to establish the fate and whereabouts of the victims: B2

(a) 继续 努力 查明 受害人 的 命运 或 下落: B1

UN-2

2 ( bb ) “weapon” means any means that can be used to defeat or inflict bodily harm and includes any type of firearms, explosives, swords, daggers, brass knuckles, machine guns, bombs, grenades, grenade launchers, mortars or any chemical, biological weapons or any other means that can be used to harm, harm, damage or destroy a person or property and includes “illegal weapons” as defined in the 1991 Surrender of Illicit Weapons Act (XXI 1991)

2 (bb) “武器” 是 指 任何 可用 来 伤人 或 造成 身● 危害 的 物品, 包括 任何 一 类 火器 、 爆炸物 、 剑 、 匕首 、 指 节 铜 套 、 斯特恩 式 轻 机枪 、 炸弹 、 手榴弹、 火箭 发射 器 、 迫击炮 或 任何 生化 武器 或 任何 可用 来 对 人 或 对 财产 造成 伤害 、 伤痛 、 危害 或 毁坏 的 其他 物品, 包括 1991 年 《交回 非法 武器 法》 (1991 年 XXI) 界定的 “非法 武器”。

UN-2

Special Trust Fund for Additional Voluntary Contributions in Support of Approved Activities ( BE )

支持 核定 活动 补充 自愿 捐款 特别 自愿 信托 基金 (BE)

UN-2

BA – General Trust Fund for the Agreement on the Conservation of Small Cetaceans of the Baltic and North Seas – until 31 December 2005;

BA- 养护 波罗的海 和 北海 较小 的 鲸 目 动物 协定 的 一般 信托 基金, 至 2005 年 12 月 31 日;

UN-2

[ B2 ]: regarding the establishment of a national mechanism for the prevention of torture, the Committee requests information on the adoption of the draft law and whether it has entered into force.

[B2]: 关于 建立 国家 预计 酷刑 机制, 委员会 要求 进一步 说明 通过 法律 草案 和 该 机制 运行 情况。

UN-2

Agenda Item 97 ( bb ) – General and Complete Disarmament: Transparency in Arms – United Nations Register of Conventional Arms – Report of the Secretary General [A Ar.

项目 97 (bb) —— 全面 彻底 裁军: 军备 的 透明度 —— 联合国 常规 武器 登记 册 —— 秘书长 的 报告 [阿 、 中 、 英 、 法 、 俄 、 西] —— 12 页

UN-2

Meeting of States Parties to the Convention on the Prohibition of the Development, Production and Stockpiling of Bacteriological (Biological) and Toxin Weapons and on Their Destruction [decision of the States Parties at the Seventh Review Conference] bc

禁止 细菌 (生物) 及 毒素 武器 的 发展 、 生产 和 储存 以及 销毁 这类 武器 的 公约 缔约国 会议 [缔约国 在 第七 次 审查 大会 上 做出 的 决定] b, c

UN-2

bb ) support measures to strengthen the capacity of the Secretariat of the Union of the Mano River Basin States

bb) 支持 马诺 河 联盟 秘书处 的 能力 建设

MultiUn

[ B2 ]: more information is needed on decisions taken, if any, regarding the establishment of a national human rights institution.

[B2]: 一旦 作出 设立 国家 人权 机构 的 决定, 需 提供 最新 资料 加以 说明。

UN-2

bb ) notes with concern that many situations of statelessness are protracted and invites UNHCR to pay special attention to them and work with the States concerned to work out measures to improve and end these situations

bb) 关切 地 指出, 许多 无国籍 情况 长期 存在, 并 请 难民 署 对 这些 情况 给予 特别 关注, 并 与 有关 国家 探讨 可以 改善 并 制止 这种 情况 的 措施。

MultiUn

[ B2 ]: While the report provides information on local follow-up to the Committee’s recommendation, including police training programs, additional information should be requested, including:

[B2]: 虽然 报告 阐述 了 为 落实 委员会 建议 采取 的 地方 措施, 包括 组织 警官 培训, 但是 还应 提供 以下 补充 资料:

UN-2

I would be grateful if you would circulate this letter and its annex as a document of the General Assembly under agenda items # (h) # (l) and # ( bb )

认为 土库曼斯坦 与 其他 国家 和 国际 组织 在 确保 和平 与 安全 方面 建立 伙伴 关系 有 重要 意义

MultiUn

[ B2 ]: While the report provides information on local follow-up to the Committee’s recommendation, including police training programs, additional information should be requested, including:

[B2]: 虽然 报告 阐述 了 为 落实 委员会 建议 所 采取 的 地方 措施, 包括 为 警官 举办 的 培训, 然而, 应 提供 下述 补充 资料:

UN-2

Each project design document includes a proposed [standardized] baseline [for a specific project] [for multiple projects] and is submitted to the designated operational entity for approval in accordance with the provisions of Appendix B2 .

每个 项目 设计 书 应 包含 特定 项目 建议 或 [标准] [多种 项目] 建议 基线, 并按 附录 B 的 规定 提交 指定 业务 实 ble 审定。

UN-2

90,000 5 Chinese Wedding Traditions You Didn’t Know About – MATRIOSHKA

Chinese weddings are luxurious celebrations where the focus is not only on the happy lovers, but also on the families of the bride and groom. The holiday is rich in rituals and traditions, the purpose of which is to attract happiness and prosperity to the couple, as well as to get rid of the influence of evil spirits.

1. After the engagement, the bride’s family must return the groom’s gifts

Before the wedding ceremony in China, the groom presents the bride’s parents with expensive gifts (gold jewelry, wax candles in the shape of a dragon and phoenix, wine or other alcohol, etc.).symbolizing prosperity and success, as an official marriage proposal. The bride’s parents, in turn, must return half of the gifts as a sign of consent to the groom’s proposal, and also in order to show that they want to continue to have good relations with his family.

2. The bed for the bride and groom is prepared by the whole family

The ritual of preparing the bed for the bride and groom usually takes place on a favorable day, selected in advance according to the lunar calendar, two to three days before the wedding.This tradition is carried out by one of the bride’s relatives with her parents, husband, children and grandchildren. The newlyweds’ bed should be made with new red linens and pillows, inside which are placed bags of dried fruit mixtures such as longan, persimmon and red dates. The combination of these fruits symbolizes abundance and fertility, which means that healthy children will be born in such a marriage and the family will always live in abundance.

3. The date of the wedding is chosen by a fortune teller.

In China, the date of the wedding ceremony cannot be chosen by chance.Choosing a wedding date is sacred to the future of the newlyweds, which is why many couples consult with a fortune teller, monk or feng shui specialist to choose the most auspicious date that will bring good luck to their marriage. When choosing a wedding date, the Chinese zodiac signs of the bride and groom and their dates of birth are taken into account. In this case, much more attention is paid to the date of birth of the bride than to the date of birth of the groom in order to calculate a favorable day for the wedding.

4. At the wedding, the bride wears a necklace with the image of a pig

Do not be surprised, but among the wedding jewelry of the bride you can find a necklace of gold with the image of a pig.This may seem strange to Europeans, but the Chinese have a completely logical explanation for such an unusual accessory. Traditionally, in China, the pig is a symbol of prosperity and fertility, which means that the family will never suffer from a lack of finance.

5. Symbols of good luck and auspicious colors

All Chinese wedding decorations are dominated by red and gold colors. Red symbolizes love, success, happiness and fertility, while gold is a symbol of wealth and prosperity.

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